#wc: 365
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Guys this is such a surprise I have no idea how this happened. That's a stream for every day this year
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lgchyuk · 1 year ago
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hyukjae always liked kites.
there was something about them coloring the sky and how they reminded him of freedom and brought back memories of his young days always tugged his heart and made him smile.
the past saturdays were filled with classes and laughter, most of them still held some of the serious tone, with instructors and pertinent questions, cameras filming them, waiting for reactions. hyuk had to remind himself, countless times, that those were not free saturdays you get to spend with people you care about; it was all about evaluations, their trainee agendas, and everything was done with a plan.
still, hyuk was anticipating november 25.
kites were his favorite and learning about them, was good, to say the least. it wasn’t just something historical or practical and beautiful, but there was a calmness about choosing fabric, and paper to create their own kites.
it was a surprise to find hyuk so focused on the class, he was normally hyperactive, talking to other trainees, but this time he was collected, selecting his colors, learning how the wind could influence the way his kite would fly and how successful it’d stand there, beautifully in the sky.
when it was time to finally try his kite - he chose a beautiful mix of emerald green, burgundy, and gold - hyuk replayed every instruction he had heard earlier that day. the sky was surprisingly beautiful and clear, the air was super cold but blue and he knew if he did the right thing, he would be successful.
his first attempts were a failure and he didn't know why he was so nervous about his performance, it was like he felt all eyes on him, judging his tryouts and maybe that’s why his kite didn’t find the sky the way he wanted. but when he finally took a deep breath and remembered how he used to have so much fun when he played with his father, his fingers weren't trembling anymore and he just allowed the wind to take his kite.
and just like magic, it was there, coloring the sky, joining the other trainees’ kites. it gave hyuk a sense of belonging, and being free.
just what he always needed.
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noonecareslol · 6 months ago
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𒀯𝐀𝐧𝐚𝐱𝐢𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚
Anaxiphilia: love for or attraction to unsuitable mates; an act of falling in love with the wrong person
Hwang In-Ho x Fem! Reader
wc! 7k
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𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After you move away from your childhood best friend (and first love), the last place you expected to see him was stuck with you as a “player”.
TW: Violence (duh its squid game), cursing, smut 18+ pnv, unsafe sex, probably pregnant lol
⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Classical music filled your ears as your eyes adjusted to the bright lights. It played throughout the room as you woke slowly and attempted to make sense of your surroundings. But, as you looked at the number placed on your tracksuit you remembered where you were.
Or at least why you were there.
You were never uncomfortable growing up. You were actually quite wealthy. Your father owned a very successful company, your mother invested money intuitively, and life seemed to improve daily. That was until you were 17 and news broke that your father’s company was a front. A money laundering business that cleaned his filthy money from years and years of fraud. When they died, they left you a monumental amount of debt. And when a suspiciously attractive guy handed you a little brown card, you couldn’t help but call the number on the back.
You knew the games were too good to be true. And you realized you were right after the first one. It took you 30 minutes to wash the blood off your face and out of your hair.
Now you were standing next to a girl with the number “222” written on her tracksuit, watching as an older lady and her son begged the guards to let them go. You fiddled with your hands, flinching at the rawness after scrubbing them relentlessly. Your attention was grabbed when another person stepped through the crowd.
“Clause three of the consent form!” Your eyes trained on him as he spoke angrily, “The games may be terminated upon a majority vote.”
Your heart stopped. You could go home and be safe. But you would still be drowning in debt. You bit your lip, remembering about the share of money you would receive. Would you have enough to cover it?
As if the guards could read your mind, a large piggy bank lowered from the ceiling, “The number of players eliminated in the first game is 91. Therefore, a total of 9.1 billion won has been accumulated.” Every eye watched as the piggy bank began to fill, “If you quit the games now, the 365 of you can equally divide the 9.1 billion won and leave with your share.”
Another man shoves past the crowd, “And how much is that?”
“Each person’s share would be 24,931,500 won.”
Exasperated sighs and annoyed words broke out amongst the crowd. But your eyes stayed trained on the man who first spoke, “456” written on his chest.
The pink guard spoke loudly, “The rule is that a hundred million won will be accumulated for each eliminated player. If you choose to play the next game, the prize amount will increase accordingly.”
The crowd stayed silent, “The total amount of prize money for all 456 players is 45.6 billion won.”
The crowd erupted again, full of enthusiastic words and motivated cheers. The girl next to you placed her hands over her stomach, almost cradling it closer to her body.
If you went home now, you wouldn’t even have enough to cover a third of your debt. But if you stay and continue the games, you could die.
The doors opened and two guards wheeled out a metal podium with two buttons, a red X and a blue O. “Now, let’s begin the vote. If you wish to continue the games, press the O button. If you wish to end them, press the X button. The vote will be held in reverse order of your player numbers.”
“Player 456.”
The same man from before stepped forward without hesitation. As he walked to the podium his stride was filled with wrath and as he slammed his palm against the X, his eye contact didn’t break with the guard.
The voting continued, each person stepping forward to decide whether to live or die. Each time either button was pressed you silently celebrated, still not sure if you should stay or go.
“Player number two.”
Your face fell as your eyes centered on the podium. And with each slow step you took, you became more sure of your decision. And as you reached the podium, you had made up your mind entirely.
A high beep rang through the room as your face reflected the blue button. You decided to continue. Flinching at the sound of defeated sighs from behind, you took the patch embroidered with an O and joined the other voters.
“Player number one.”
You hadn’t cared to look at the man when he was standing next to you earlier. But now that he was about to break a tie, your eyes were locked on him. You didn’t catch his face but you studied his figure. He had a tall frame and dark brown hair that seemed to be styled perfectly. He walked with a thick sense of confidence and you hadn’t failed to notice how his tracksuit clung to his biceps.
You watched intensely as he lifted his hand and hovered between the two buttons. The room held suspension and your eyes were locked on his hand. He hesitated for a few more moments before pressing his hand down. Blue light illuminated his face and the surrounding crowd cheered as he walked from the podium.
He had selected to stay. To play another game where you, or him, could die. You voted for that too. So why aren’t you happy about winning?
Because he’s turned around now and you’ve seen his face. And you would recognize that face anywhere.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
“I don't understand, you’re moving?” He grasped the sides of your face, afraid to let go.
You looked at the boy in front of you who’ve you known your whole life. You went to private schools together, fancy parties together, and you shared your first time together. And now you’re leaving.
You placed your hands over his, “I don’t understand either In-ho. I want to stay, I don’t want to leave you.” Tears fell down your rosy cheeks as In-ho placed his forehead gently against yours.
You ignored your mother’s frantic yells for you to come and pack your things. You didn’t want to leave him. You loved him, and you knew if you left now you wouldn’t just be leaving your house. You’d be leaving your life behind. Your father would be arrested and your mother would have to work while taking care of you herself. You would move from Gangnam to Daegu. And you would have to start a new life. You just didn’t understand why In-ho couldn’t be a part of it.
That was the last time you saw him.
Well, until now.
You kept your distance, watching him talk to player 456. You recognize him from before as the man who’s already played.
You observed intensely, not bothering with your food. You watched how he exchanged words with 456. How his hair moved slightly as he used his hands to talk. You didn’t understand why he was here. The last you heard about him, he was married and his wife was expecting.
What could’ve gone so wrong for him to be here?
The girl next to you shuffled in her seat, setting her empty dosirak-tong on the ground. You knew she was pregnant just from how she walked uncomfortably with her hands supporting her back.
“Here, take mine. I don’t like dosirak.” It was a lie, dosirak is one of your favorite meals. But she was eating for two, and you didn’t have an appetite.
She looked up at you before gently taking the metal box from your hands, “Thank you.” Her voice was barely above a whisper and you smiled in return.
Your eyes searched for In-ho again to find him walking towards a fight you hadn't noticed had broken out. His frame was large and towered over the boys as he approached them, “Boys, what are you doing in the middle of mealtime There are elders present, mind your manners. Aren’t you embarrassed?”
“You’re lecturing me when you ended up in this shithole too?” In-ho’s jaw clenched as he tilted his head at the boy, “Dude, stop running your mouth and take care of your own damn kids.”
You knew where this was heading, In-ho always knew how to fight. You smirked as he grabbed the boy, turning him around and twisting his arm behind him.
Forcing him to the ground with a thud as he whined, “Wait! I’m sorry! Please, let me go!”
He let go of his arm and stood up straight, adjusting his tracksuit. As he looked around the room while walking back toward player 456, his eyes suddenly met with yours. And he froze as he scanned your face. He was so caught up in Gi-huns plan that he had failed to realize you had entered the game. The girl he fell in love with. Who he shared his first kiss with, who he has thought about every day for 20 years since you were 17.
Your heart ached as old feelings rushed over you, watching as his eyes softened slightly before player 390 dragged him over.
You couldn’t sleep that night. You were too busy trying to figure out why he was here. Plus, you caught word of the next game being Dalgona. Which worried you because you had always sucked at cutting out the tiny shape, always giving in and eating the cookie whole.
You spent the night staring tiredly at the piggy bank, the soft yellow light casting across your face. What you didn't know is that 50 feet away, In-ho watched you. His mind also trying to understand why you were here. He stared at you, his eyes tracing the curve of your jaw, remembering when he would trail kisses on your pretty little face.
When he met your eyes earlier, he froze. Not because he didn't expect to see you, which he didn't, he froze because his heart did. He marveled at your beauty, and you took his breath away. Just like the first time he saw you all those years ago.
And now as he lays in his bed, his pillow propped up on the opposite end so he can see you, he can't help but address the elephant in the room. You know his name. You know his identity. You could ruin everything, his plan that he had focused solely on for the past three years.
As the lights turned on and classical music rang out from the speakers, his eyes stayed on you and only you.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
"Welcome to your second game. This game will be played in teams. Please divide into teams of six in the next ten minutes. Let me repeat."
Sand kicked behind you as you walked into the room. The speakers repeated the instructions as you whispered to the girl next to you, "Is Dalgona played in teams?" She shook her head and her hand caressed her belly. You've grown somewhat protective over the girl, whose name you learned is Kim Jun-hee.
You take her hand as you look to find a team and your eyes try to pick out In-ho from the crowd. You think you spot the back of his head and start to pull Jun-hee towards him when she makes a be-line to a group. Your protests go ignored as she reaches them. Your eyes still search for In-ho as she inquires about joining their group.
"Of course, you can join." The voice snaps you from your search as you meet familiar piercing brown eyes with your own. Your breath hitches in your throat as he doesn't break eye contact.
"Time for team selection is up." The PA system breaks your stare, but In-ho holds his. You look around the room, scanning over the tall blue walls and the rainbows painted on the floor, "The game you will be playing is Six-Legged Pentathlon. You will start with your legs tied together. Each member will take turns playing a minigame at every ten-meter mark, and if you win, the team can move on to the next one. Here are the minigames: Number one, the Ddakji. Number two, Flying Stone. Number three, Gonggi. Number four, Kendama. Number five, Spinning Top. Number six, Jegi. Your goal is to win all the minigames and cross the finish line in five minutes. Please decide on players for each minigame."
Your team divides the games between you. You get stuck with Kendama, a game that is played by tossing a ball into the air and attempting to catch it on a wooden stick point. You're fairly confident in yourself. You and In-ho grew up playing games like these.
You sit with your group as each team competes. You sat at the end next to Jun-Hee, checking on her every once and a while. You flinched every time a gunshot rang out, anxiety bubbling with every elimination.
In-ho could not stop looking at you. It was as if you had a magnetic pull, and he couldn't look away. You were a piece of art, crafted with the hands of God himself. And he was jealous of God's hands, wishing it had been his very own that created such beauty. Every time you looked his way, he looked elsewhere.
"Final two teams, please get ready." You help Jun-hee stand up, 390 stepping in place next to her. Standing on the other side of 388 as you all line up at the start. You lower your gaze as In-ho steps in line next to you. He's always been intimidating, especially with his large frame towering over yours.
390 chuckles, "It's weird to be the only ones who don't get an audience, isn't it?" His attempt to lighten the mood works a little, a small smile forming on your lips.
"I think it will help us focus more!" You rub 388's shoulder in comfort while he repeats the motions of throwing and catching the Gonggi.
The guard finishes locking In-ho's and 456's shackles before you feel an arm snake around yours. In-ho's bicep compresses your own as your face heats up. You glance up daringly meeting In-hos sharp gaze. You should say something. Anything. Ask him why he's here, or where his wife is. But before you can speak, 456 starts the chant and steps forward.
"Hana dul! Hana dul! Hana dul!" You chant as you approach the first game. Jun-hee slams the red ddakji down, successfully flipping the blue one on the first try.
As you chant and walk to the next game, 388 breaks the pace and steps forward quickly. Without hesitation In-ho's hand moves from your arm to your waist, effortlessly steadying you "Hey! Keep the pace!"
388 steps back into pace as we reach the next game, "Back when I used to pitch, I never threw very fast, but the ball always went where I wanted." 390 steps one foot back before aiming and throwing the stone precisely, hitting the target on the first try!
You all cheer before continuing forward, quickly approaching three minutes. As you sit on the ground you feel In-ho steadying you again, allowing you to lean slightly against him to give 388 more room to play his game.
"Okay, just take your time. You got this." I reassure 388 as he grabs the gonggi. With a quick hand, he tosses one in the air before collecting them one at a time. Then two at a time, Then three and one. Then all. He flips them on the back of his hand before catching them effortlessly.
Your cheers were quick as you stood up and rushed towards the fourth game. The guard hands you the Kendama and you can feel In-ho's gaze on you intensely. You held the Kendama out in front of you, tossing the ball up, quickly moving your hand to catch it. You close your eyes as you feel the ball land on the spike.
"Yes! You did it Y/N!" In-ho grabs your shoulders and shakes you, you shake his back as he beams a smile at you. And for a second, you forget about the timer and you're both 17 again, in love.
He wraps his arm around your waist again as you move to his game. He takes the spinning top in his hand and begins to wrap the rope around it, confidence radiating from him. We have this in the bag! -oh.
The rope fell off.
You feel his body tighten as stress began to build. He wraps the rope around once more before tossing it, praying that the top spins. It falls to its side and In-ho curses under his breath. You remember him using his left hand when growing up to play this game. You wondered why he was using his right, but you didn't ask him. You could tell he was getting annoyed at himself.
"It's okay! Just try again!" You let go of In-ho's arm to give him more room. He flings the spinning top with too much power and it flings backwards.
In-ho freezes, too embarrassed to move. The man next to him, 456, grabs his shoulder firmly, "It's okay, we'll get it. All right, backwards. Ready, set."
In-ho holds my waist tightly as we walk backwards in step, "It'd be boring to win everything fast." The group nods in agreement at 390's words, " 'Cause if you're ever gonna grow, you need to fail first, right?"
In-ho picks up the spinning top and we trek back to the line. He wraps the rope around successfully, "Okay now take it slow, wait- no don't rush it!"
In-ho interrupted 388's instructions by quickly, and messily, throwing the top. It falls to the side and you feel In-ho throw his head back and laugh. You quickly remove your hand from his waist, knowing what's about to happen.
"You piece of fucking shit! You ruin everything! You're worthless!" In-ho drops the piece of rope in his hand as he hits his head against his hands. "You're so pathetic!"
The group stands shocked as he hits himself angrily, stomping in the dried blood below him. You bend down and pick up the rope, glancing at the clock.
50 seconds.
"Hey!" You slam the rope against his chest and pull his face to look at you, "No one's blaming any of this on you! Now, take a deep breath, okay?"
In-ho nodded slowly, the feeling of your touch burning on his face as he placed his right hand over his chest, something he would do when you were younger. As the group shuffles to pick up the top, you place one of your hands over his and slow his breathing, "You can do this In-ho. Use your left hand like you did when we were kids. And if I die because of this I will kill you myself."
In-ho gave a small smile at your sarcasm as he wraps the rope around the axel, then the top. He places it in his left hand and looks at you quickly before throwing the top.
It spins.
You erupt in cheers as In-ho succeeds! He gives a quick hug to you, that you wished had lasted longer, and your group moves to 456's turn. In-ho's gaze darkened as he focused on 456, and you failed to notice it, still flustered from the quick hug.
"One! Two! Three! Four!" You all counted as 456 bounced the jegi on his foot, watching him and the clock as it counts down. For a split moment it seemed that he wouldn't be able to get the last hit in, but suddenly In-ho swoops in and reaches with his foot. "Five!"
You all cheer as you practically run to the end, crossing right as the timer hit zero. The heavy shackles get removed and you are immediately engulfed in a bear hug from In-ho. His arms wrap around the small of your back as he pulls you closer to his frame, if possible. He buries his head in the crook of your neck and you stay frozen. Not from the near- death- experience you just had, but because you realized you had forgotten what his hugs had felt like. You threw your arms around him in return, deepening the hug you have longed for every day for 20 years.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
You sat closely next to In-ho as the group chatted and complemented each others moves from the game. You were looking forward to catching up with In-ho, but you were too engrossed in 388's retelling of 390's stone toss, "And, sir, you were incredible at Flying Stone!" He proudly stood up and pretended to throw a stone, "You just lined it up and... Boom! First try!"
You giggled as 390 proudly shaked his head, and In-ho turned to look at you. God, that laugh. He had forgotten what it sounded like, and he frowned when you stopped, "I was thinking, what if we go around and say what our real names are? I'll go first, my name is Kang Dae-ho. Dae as in 'huge' and ho as in 'tiger'!"
390 laughed as Dae-ho gave himself tiger fangs with his fingers, "Now that's a cool name. My name is Park Jung-bae. It means 'righteous' and 'double.' So, I should be living twice as righteously."
"My name is Kim Jun-hee. I don't think I know what it stands for." Jun-hee smiles as she pushes a stray hair from her face.
"Jun means 'talented' and hee means 'star'. You are a talented star Jun-hee!" You ruffle her hair as she beams at you, "My name is Y/N. L/N, Y/N."
You can feel In-ho's stare as he watches your lips move, "My name is Young-il. You know, like 'yeong il.' 'Zero one' in Korean." You whipped your head towards him. Was there a reason he was hiding his name? Did he not trust anyone? He gave you a reassuring look, you'd just ask him later.
"My full name is Seong Gi-Hun." You looked away from In-ho's gaze as you watched 456 introduce himself.
"Seong Gi-hun. Like our un-'Seong' hero?" Everyone laughed but you. You were still pondering about In-ho. There were so many unanswered questions running through your mind. In-ho must have noticed your distant look, because he gave your hand a squeeze. A promise that he'll explain everything.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
After another failed vote to go home (you had voted to leave this time), Gi-hun warned about the possibility of an ambush. It plagued your mind with worry as you laid on your mattress. Another night of no sleep adding to the eyebags growing under your pretty E/C eyes.
Gi-hun stood from his watch as In-ho took over, and headed to bed. Now was your chance to fully reconnect with In-ho, "Can I sit here?"
In-ho turned to you, "Cant sleep?" He asked as he scooted over a tad, making room for you. He didn't make a whole lot of room though, which you didn't mind.
Your thighs touched as you sat next to him, "No, never could when my mind is running like this." You dusted off your pants as you placed your legs out in front of you, fingers avoiding the blood that plagued your bottoms.
"You shouldn't be anxious about the game tomorrow." He watched your face intently, trying to read you. You were always so easy to read.
You stifle a small laugh, "Oh i'm not anxious, 'Young-il'. " You tilted your head towards him as you dragged out his "name", smirking as he nodded defeatedly.
"Ohhh, okay." He leaned in close, making your heart flutter, "I just don't want anyone to know my name yet. In a game like this there's a lot of... betrayal."
Your spine shivered as his words tickled your ear, "Oh, I guess I didn't think about that..." You turned to look at him but failed to realize how close he was.
Your lips were now inches apart, barely. You could feel his breath fan across your lips and his eyes remained focused on yours, "It can be our little secret? Hmm?" You found yourself nodding before you could even process what he said.
You didn't move, instead, you tested the waters. You leaned in closer, tilting your head slightly, "Last I heard you were married?"
He shook his head no, not caring to explain as he quickly licked his lips, his eyes now focusing on your own. Your breath caught as your heart beat at an unearthly rate, he was so close. If either of you moved your head even a centimeter, his lips would be on yours.
But you weren't able to find out. The small metal door slammed as Jun-hee, Hyun-ju, and Ae-sim walked in, and you pulled back quickly. "I should try and sleep."
In-ho nodded as you walked away, his eyes trailed the curve of your ass and he adjusted his pants slightly before going back to his watch.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
"Players, welcome to the third game. We will begin momentarily. The game you will be playing today is Mingle." The beady-eyed horses caught your attention first. The black, soulless, painted eyes boring into your own as you followed behind In-ho. "I will now explain the rules of the game. All players will step onto the platform in the center of the arena. Once the game begins, the platform will spin. Shortly after, a number will be called out. You must then form a group that matches this number, enter one of the surrounding rooms, and close the door within 30 seconds, or be eliminated."
You stopped in front of the red platform, In-ho stopped next to you, "The real crucial thing for us to do is to stay calm and don't panic. Trust each other. And we'll all get out of here in once piece." He looked down at you, a need to protect you suddenly clear, "Deal?"
You looked up at him, "Deal." And he took your hand as you both stepped on the platform.
"With that, let the game begin!" The woman over the PA system was replaced with a nursery song, "Round And Round". The platform jolted before starting its spin, and you grasp onto In-ho for support as he steadies you.
"Ten."
The lights were replaced with flashing red as In-ho pulled you close. Gi-hun grabbed a group of 3 people as you searched for an open door, "Room 44!" You pointed to the light green door before dragging In-ho and Dae-ho with you. Hyun- ju grabbed a stray woman while running through the green door, barely making it.
In-ho placed his hands on the sides of your arms firmly, "Are you okay?"
"Yes." You breathed out, trying to catch your breath.
He took one hand and cupped your face, "Just stick with me. You'll be okay." You nod as the door unlocks and he grabs your hand, leading you back to the platform.
You spin for another few agonizing seconds with your hand still firmly grasped in In-ho's. "Five."
Your face fell, there were six of you. Who was going to leave? In-ho quickly pushes you into Jung-bae's grasp, "Watch her, i'll go! Hurry!" In-ho takes one more glance towards you as he runs through the crowd.
Jung-bae drags you with the others as you call for In-ho, "Young- il! Young-il!" The door locks behind you and you break from Jung-bae's hold.
"Im sure hes okay. He's smart Y/N." You press your face to the door, peering out of the small window, searching for his tall frame. You know he's smart, but you were so scared of losing him again you couldn't even register the other players getting shot in front of your door.
It unlocks and you push it open, rushing out and onto the platform. You whip your head around as you scanned for In-ho. When you lock eyes with his brown ones you make a beeline towards him, pushing past other players as you jump into his arms, "What ever happened to, "Stick with me"?"
His hand wrapped protectively behind your neck, cradling you in his arms, "I know, im sorry. But i'm okay." He pulled your head away to look at him, a small smile resting on his face.
The platform began to spin as you and In-ho stood next to Jun-hee, "Attention, players. The final round will now begin." The God forsaken nursery rhyme plays again, and this time, your eyes were glued to In-ho.
"What do you think the number will be?" Jun-hee asked curiously while clinging onto Dae-ho.
"It will be two." In-ho looked towards her.
"Wait, why?"
He squeezes your hand, "We're at 126 people, and there are 50 rooms. Even if there's two in every room, then there's still only enough for 100 of us. If you don't find one fast, you're done for."
The platform comes to a halt. "Two." The lights flash again and In-ho pulls you on instinct, running to a yellow door.
In-ho was going to keep you safe, at any cost.
You look back towards the group for a split second when your body meets the ground, you look up in slow motion as the man who pushed you runs to the door. You took a staggered breath before grabbing onto his ankle, slamming him to the ground and buying you enough time to run in behind In-ho and close the door.
Relief washed over you only momentarily as your eyes met with a third person in the room. In-ho steps in front of you, "Out."
"But, we were here first. Why don't you put her out and I stay?" In-ho tilts his head at his last remark before wrapping his biceps around the man's head.
The door behind you shook as the other man tries to push it open, you are quick to press your body weight against it to hold it close, "In-ho, what do we do?" Your voice was frantic as the countdown continued.
In-ho's arms tighten around the mans neck as he pulls and pushes at his grasp, but In-hos eyes never faltered. Not once. They stayed piercing yours, full of determination.
"Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two..." The cracking sound of the mans neck made you flinch, his lifeless body hitting the floor with a thud.
I did say in-ho would keep you safe. At any cost.
"One."
The door locked behind you as you pressed your back against it, In-ho's stare stuck on you as he stepped over the man's body and towards you. He pushed your body against the door, his hand finding the flesh of your waist as his other hand pulled your neck into a desperate kiss. You became putty under his touch as he dug his fingers into your skin, he craved your touch as much as you did. And it was taking every muscle in his body not to take you and fuck you right now.
Your hands traveled from his chest and up to his neck, pulling him closer. A small whine escaped your pretty lips as he slid his hand up and under your shirt, the same hands he just used to kill for you.
For you.
You felt the door unlock with a click behind you. And In-ho pulled away reluctantly as your head fell back against the door, "I need you Y/N." He brushed his thumb over your red and swollen lips before taking your hand, and leading you out of the door.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
"Attention, all players. Lights-out will be in approximately 30 minutes. With the remaining half hour, please disperse, and prepare to return to your beds for the night."
You sat next to Jung-bae who was excitedly talking about the next vote with Dae-ho as you watched In-ho move your mattress next to his. You hadn't dared to tell a soul about what happened in the yellow room, the kiss or the dead guy.
And you weren't going to tell anyone.
You should be concerned, right? Concerned over how easy it was for him to snap a guys neck without breaking eye contact? He was emotionless, cold, really attractive. You had witnessed many fights between him and other men while growing up, especially when it came to fighting over you.
But he never once killed for you. Until now, at least. Were you wrong to think it was really hot?
"Once the lights go out, the ones who wanna stay are gonna come for us." Gi-huns voice broke you from your thoughts, "Killing us would mean they win the next vote. It would also increase the prize money."
In-ho sat down next to you, his hand immediately finding your back, "We have to attack first then, it's our only chance. Those guys assume we're just waiting it out till the next vote. When the lights go down, we should hit them first since they won't expect it." He looked at you out of the corner of his eye, watching is you nod in agreement.
Gi-hun shook his head and leaned in closer to the group, "No, we can't. We'd be playing right into their hands if we did."
"Who is 'they'?" You tilted your head as you asked, failing to notice In-ho's gaze darken.
"The ones who built this whole place. The ones who created the games and who watch us play." The group listens closely, "If we're gonna try and fight anyone, we should be going after them instead."
"Sure, but where are they?"
Gi-hun looks up, "They're up there. At the top of the staircases. They keep everything here running from up in their central control room." He looks back at the group, "There's a man in a black mask who's the head of the operation. If we can get to him, we finally can end this."
In-ho sighs in disagreement, "It's too risky. Even if we manage to get a few guns they'll outnumber us when we try to get out." You feel his hand slide from your back and wrap around your waist.
"What are you suggesting? That we fight the other group through the whole entire night, and hope that we all make it? Is that it, Young-il? Do you really think that's a good plan?" Gi-huns voice is a little raised and you feel In-ho's grip on you tighten.
"Do we... stand a chance?"
"If we can manage an ambush, yes. Those bastards up there, they'll never expect our side to attack. They'll be focused on other things. This is it." You nodded with Dae-ho, ready to fight, "This is our last chance to put an end to these games and make sure they never happen again."
"Lights out in ten seconds."
"Once the lights are off, we have to get under our beds as quietly as we can. We can't afford to get caught by the other side. And we know they'll be out for blood." Gi-hun whispers as he slides under his bed.
You and In-ho follow suit, laying on your stomachs as you peer out from under your bed. You feel the contrast between your shaky breaths and his own steady breathing, and you can't comprehend how he could be so calm.
"Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one."
"I have a plan." In-ho's voice was barely above a whisper, and a shiver runs down your spine at the sound of a woman yelling.
You look at him, "But, what about Gi-hun's plan?"
You didn't miss the small smirk that played on his lips, "Just stay by my side." Without a word In-ho swiftly moves from out of his bed, pulling you with him.
"Wait! What are you-" His hand came to your mouth as you both hugged the wall while discreetly moving towards the small metal door.
In-ho removed his hand to place a short knock. The small window opened, a guard peering through the flap. Without a single question, the door opened, and In-ho was quick to push you through.
You watched as the guard swiftly opened the bathroom door allowing you and In-ho to enter. You turned to the door as it shut behind you before looking at In-ho, "How did that guard just let you through? I don't understand, we have to go back In-ho."
"Or we can stay. We're safe here- you're safe here." He stood on the opposite wall in front of you, watching as you rested your hand on the doorknob.
He knew you were thinking about going back. But he also knew you weren't going to. He had you wrapped around his finger, just like all those years ago. And you knew it too.
You dropped your hand from the doorknob, biting your lip as you feel him slowly stalk towards you. Need courses through your veins as his hand comes from behind and wraps around your neck, his other hand pulls your waist against him. His lips find your neck and you've melted instantly.
His bulge presses harshly against your ass as he sucks and bites your neck with unhuman desire. This wasn't like when you were younger, when you were flustered and shy. No. You were hungry with want and your eyes were filled with lust.
He whips you around, lips on your own now as he moves you backwards to the counter. Your knees go weak and he lifts you with ease, as if you weighed nothing, and places you on the counter. Your fingers dug into his back, desperate for more. Hungry for him.
In-ho bites your lip roughly, and you give him what he wants, opening your lips wider and letting his tongue fuck your mouth. You were intoxicated, In-ho was the man you thought of each night as you fucked yourself, screaming his name into oblivion. And now here he was, hiking your shirt over your head.
"Y/N." Your name slipped from In-ho's mouth swiftly as he lifts your shirt over your head before his lips find your exposed skin. A small whine escapes your lips as his hot mouth gives your cold skin goosebumps.
It was like that small little noise ignited something animalistic within him, a grunt fell off his tongue as he bit your skin. He loved the way you squirmed as he dipped his tongue into your collarbone, his eyes looking up at you.
Sweat slicked your forehead as your head throws back, your bra falling from your tits, landing on the floor. How did he take it off? His hand didnt even-
oh.
Oh.
You looked at the bra, the back was still clasped.But the straps, the straps were ripped. He had ripped your bra off of you with hunger. But, you couldn't focus on the bra anymore as a moan escaped your mouth, your hands gripping the edge of the counter as In-ho rolls your nipple under his tongue.
He trailed sloppy kisses up to your mouth before stepping back, observing you. He pulls his shirt of with ease, "Take off your pants." It was demanding, and you obeyed. Your fingers trembled as you slipped off your bottoms and panties.
In-ho presses his tongue against his cheek, cocking his head as he takes you in piece by piece. You were sprawled out on the counter, your back resting against the mirror and your chest heaved, "What. What are you looking at In-ho."
"I'm thinking about all the bruises your pretty body is going to have after I fuck you."
He sinks to his knees in front of you, throwing your legs over his shoulders as he delves his tongue into your folds. You gasp, your legs involuntarily locking around his head. His tongue laps as he looks up at you. His nose perfectly brushes your clit, and he knows it as you rock your hips, "Oh, f-fuck. In-ho please."
He smirks against you as you sputter his name. He feels himself growing harder each time you whimper under his mouth. He drinks you up, your taste slicking on his face as you his tongue finds your clit.
One of your hands remove from the edge of the counter and find its way to his hair, "In-ho please," You pull his hair up to make him look at you, "If you stop now, I-I will kill you."
A small chuckle vibrates through your core as his lips latch your clit, rolling it under his tongue. Your legs pull him closer, if possible, and you feel your climax building. You arch your hips, rolling against his mouth as the need to cum grows louder. In-ho roughly laps on your swollen clit, desperate for your release.
And suddenly the earth stops spinning as you dissolve into pleasure, letting yourself unravel under him. Your body jerks as shockwaves move throughout your body, and you let his name roll of your tongue.
"Scoot down." You do as you're told and wiggle your ass until its slightly off the counter. In-ho watches as you still attempt to steady your breathing, smirking as he dips the waist of his pants down.
Your eyes widen as he places one of his hands on the side of your body, letting him tower over you. Your eyes trailed to his other hand that was busy lining his dick up with your core, but his eyes are on you. Waiting to watch your reaction as you take his cock.
He sinks into you, your breath catching and your eyes closing as he doesn't ease you into it, stretching you out. A grunt escapes his mouth at your reaction, you were so beautiful like this.
In-ho leans back and takes a hold of both of your ankles, holding them above you as he sets the pace. Your knuckles turn white as you grip the counter with one hand and cover your mouth with the other.
In-ho quickens the pace with each thrust, pounding into you like a toy. Animalistic grunts escape his mouth, "Y/N, you're so good for me. I've missed this so -fuck- so much."
You whine at his words, desperate attempts to buck your hips failed. He had you pinned down under you, controlling everything. He can feel the way you grip him, lustful tension building in the air, "Atta girl."
Oh fuck, he feels so good. He fits perfectly in you, just like all those years ago. The passion was still there, and god, he made you know it. You're drunk with desire, clenching around him as the pace picks up. His thrusts are sharp, deep, and you can tell he's close.
Your hands find his face, forcing him to look at you. His eyes met yours as his cock hit every. right. spot. His eyes softened, a contrast to his pornoraphic thrusts. In the middle of everything, all the death around you, you rekindled a love you never thought you would experience again.
Your eyes stay locked as the grip on your ankles tightened, In-ho's head dropping slightly as he came, time slowing as waves of electricity engulfed him. Warmth flooded over your body as he pulsed inside of you, gently laying your legs back down before leaning forward.
He pulled you close to him, his hands cupping your face and his thumb gently lifting your chin, "I love you Y/N." A smile displayed on his lips as he kissed you softly.
You bit back a sob, "In-ho... I never stopped loving you. You've been my person, even when you weren't mine."
He kissed you again, this time with promise. A promise of making it out of the games, a promise of love, a promise of hope.
In-ho never thought much of a future. He always saw himself living for the games. He expected to die as the front man, he didn't have anything to lose. But now he does. He has a future now, and it's you. He is not living for the games anymore. He is living for you.
Would you still love him when you find out the truth?
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚ ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
A/N: Hey pookies!! Tysm for all the love recently it's definitely motivated for me to come out of retirement. Pls lmk who I should write for next! I'm in a squid game mood so maybe Gi-hun?
@tsarinaaaz @flowersbloom8787 @vixtyhu @dottoremybbg @fnl9zer @cdej6 @galadoesart @watasinekoru @icantcryicantstopcrying @seasaltrasp @pepsicolacoochie @lily-ann-b @gurjxxpp11
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lgcmjun · 1 year ago
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sometimes it felt as if he was forever living in a juldarigi game.
minjun sighed at the end of their last day of activities. it was tiring, he would never deny that but there were some brilliant moments as well. he could’ve listed tons of them, most of them were related to the people playing all those games, instead of the games themselves.
sometimes he felt he enjoyed more dealing with people than the situation they were involved in, which was surprising because minjun would normally be caught observing rather than engaging, but those saturdays they spent with other trainees served for him to bond with a lot of their fellow company members.
which led him to the infamous juldarigi game they played in one of those weeks. minjun was still sore from it but he couldn’t say he didn’t like it. he couldn’t unsee how the game of strength and pull and push reminded him of his life lately and how much he struggled to keep his feet on the ground and not be swamped by the storm that was the latest event that happened to him.
family had always been an important part of his life but lately, minjun realized they weren’t on the same side of this endless juldarigi game. right now he was alone on one side and his parents and jimin were just against him, and he didn’t seem to find a way to win that game. he was almost crossing the line, his legs weren’t that strong anymore, no matter how he tried to hold his ground, as it was instructed.
for just a moment he wanted his family dynamic to be as smooth as the kites flying around but he was never good at allowing things to leave his hands and control them only when they were up in the air. kites were too delicate and unlike anything in his life, he wasn’t skilled to keep them controlled and in the sky.
perhaps he needed more training. perhaps he needed to let go.
kites were never his thing anyway.
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bechaerin · 2 years ago
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✦ * ·  ˚ CHUSEOK 2023. how chaerin spends most of her time in seoul, even during the chuseok holidays.
considering that most of her family resides in seoul, chuseok never felt too different for chaerin. it was a great time to get some rest and spend time with extended family, but she's never had to go through the rush of driving down five to six hours to a countryside home or anything like that. oddly enough, while the people around her would complain about the long drive down, she was quite jealous that they had somewhere to go.
the city was great, of course, and this was the only place chaerin knew, but she'd check her friends' instagram stories and whatnot and be jealous of the greenery they get to see around this time of the year. the most that her family did was gather at her grandmother's apartment and have some nice food and play yutnori. she wasn't complaining about her own family's traditions, but she thinks a change would be nice.
maybe it's because they've all grown up, but none of the lee's change into hanbok either. with her youngest cousin being in high school as well, nobody has much fun with it anyway. instead, they bow to their grandparents, get their allowance money and then settle around in front of the television to watch a drama or movie together. during that time, the adults are usually cutting fruit and gossiping about what they heard around the neighborhood.
despite her conflicting feelings about wanting to try something new, there's something awfully comforting about having her whole family around. they've always been so supportive, and though chuseok isn't too different from their usual weekends, it still feels nice to put meaning into the holiday. now that she thinks about it, chaerin doesn't think she'll change this for anything.
sure, it'd be nice to get some fresh air in the countryside, but they could always go for a hike at bukhansan instead. there's still tasty food around and the warmth of her extended family is always there, even when it's not the chuseok holiday. chaerin finds herself with a smile on her face and a sense of emptiness when everybody leaves, so that must be a sign that she enjoys her family's own traditions.
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ryescapades-archived · 4 months ago
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*ੈ‧₊༺ "AND GIVE ME THE NIGHT AND DAY,"
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characters: kaji ren (wbk) x f!reader contents: nsfw mdni !! oral (f!receiving), slight somno + overstim, cum eating, hair pulling wc ~ 700 (not proofread! just a bunch of hornknee word vomit)
a/n: title inspo from 365 by zedd & katy perry! to all my moots who have been enabling ryekaji the past week, i love u guys sm
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you feel the blankets rustle around you, a sudden gush of wind causing your thighs to twitch in the cold. the room is still dark as your eyes flutter awake, the silhouette looming over your bottom half freezing when you furrow your eyebrows in your sleep-induced state.
“ren…?”
the absence of his headphones and a sucker in his mouth makes him feel quite out of place, though then again the reason he’s here in the first place is to remediate one of those problems…
kaji falters, metallic eyes taking note of the hoodie you’re wearing, one that you��d undoubtedly stolen from his wardrobe. the piece of clothing engulfs you in an endearing heap, the hem of it brushing against the middle of your thighs where the lack of pants only seems to make him swallow at nothing.
from where he’s kneeling on the bed, his gaze drifts back up to yours, “sorry, i–” he hesitates for a second, “can i…?” kaji wordlessly glances down at the apex of your thighs, and your heavily lidded eyes give a single bleary blink before you speak. “go ahead,” the affirmation washes over him like a wispy cloud lulled by the morning breeze.
he wastes no time, lowering himself to slowly lick a stripe up your bare pussy. the moment his tongue makes contact with your cunt, a moan is pulled out of your mouth, soft and breathy as you tiredly throw your head back against the pillow. he starts off slow, all smooches and kitten-licks over your mound. he’s gentle with his ministrations, extremely so that you’re beginning to fall back asleep from his touch.
your hand reaches towards him just as he laps at your dripping heat, reverently running your fingers through his blonde strands. the sound of continuous wet slurps echoes in the room, kaji’s eyes almost drooping shut as if savouring the taste of your juices.
“ren– mmhn…” you whimper into the pillow beneath your head as his tongue dives into your twitching hole, slick gushing past his moistened lips. his nose repeatedly bumps against your clit every time he switches from thrusting into you and flicking the tip of his tongue along your slits, your debauched sounds getting louder and louder as time passes.
kaji grunts as he curls his tongue, trying to take every drop of your sticky mess as much as he can. he eats at you like a man starving, drinking you up like you’re the only thing he’s ever craved to taste.
the coil in your stomach builds faster, your legs tensing beside his head before he presses his palms on the back of your thighs to spread you wider for him. “o-oh god, i’m close,” you gasp as your back arches from the mattress below, which only seems to spur him on. he fervently sucks and laps at your cunt, sensing you quivering on his tongue.
not a second later, you convulse under him, lips parting and eyes snapping shut as your orgasm rips through your whole body. you grip tighter on his hair, kaji’s name falling from your lips in a keening cry of pleasure.
oversensitivity starts to seep in when kaji doesn’t relent, his mouth still latched onto your soaked pussy. you protest with a slurred whine, pushing at his shoulder and trying to buck your hips away. “ren– ren! ‘s enough,”
he gives one last intense slurp and a loud prolonged suck at your swollen clit, causing you to yelp and only then does he pull away. it’s a habit kaji had grown accustomed to whenever you’re forcing him away from the sweet nectar between your thighs, much like how he’d begrudgingly pull out his lollipops on several occasions.
“‘m sorry, ‘m sorry. you just taste so good,” he rasps, not bothering to wipe away the shine on his chin from the mixture of his spit and your cum as he peppers butterflies kisses on the inside of your thighs. kaji revels in the way your hand is still sifting through his already disheveled hair, albeit weakly as he watches you eventually go back to your much needed slumber.
a pretty thing like you, letting him have such a sweet little treat. kaji should probably think of something to gift to you in the morning.
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taglist open !
thought abt this like literally in the middle of my exam and i had to get it down asap right after i got back wtf Wtf someone get this man away from me!!! (don't pls )
©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !
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amatariki · 1 month ago
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24/7, 365 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ i'm on a knee, i just need a "yes"
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(AUTREMENT) — when jake takes you out on a date after his lacrosse game, you don't expect him to get down on one knee.
the muse: non-idol!sim jaeyun x fem!reader; established relationship wc: 1.66k warnings: kissing, skinship, fluff, not proofread, plot twist, jake loves calling you 'angel', reader calls jake an 'idiot' lovingly
whispers: not very proud of this one...i feel like my writing is lacking nowadays. but it's my first try at trying to get jake's character down so. idk if the plot twist is a plot twist but the plot is probably not as straightforward as it seems ig.
reblog and i'll kiss you <3
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"She really is your good luck charm, huh?" Jay asks teasingly, slapping Jake's back.
It wasn't a mystery as to why Jake always managed to score twice as many goals than usual whenever you were there at his lacrosse games. Watching you standing in the sidelines, cheering for him in his jersey. It gave him an energy boost that he couldn't get even if he chugged 10 Red Bulls.
"We're going to miss you next year, hyung," Jungwon adds, taking off his gear.
"Yeah," Sunoo agrees. "We're gonna lose three of our best players with you, Jay hyung, and Sunghoon hyung going off to college after summer."
"You guys are still gonna be playing for the lacrosse team there with Heeseung hyung, aren't you?" Riki asks, his eyes shining with admiration at being able to play for a big college.
"Yep," Jake says, running his hands through his hair. He opens his mouth to speak but he quickly smiles instead after seeing you run into the locker room.
You cage him in a warm bear hug, trying your best to engulf Jake's larger frame with your small body. "You did amazing!" You beam at him.
Jake's face and ears turn red at the compliment, his hand rubbing circles on the small of your back. "Thank you," he says, leaning down to kiss your forehead before pulling back and just gazing at you lovingly.
Jake clears his throat after hearing Sunghoon snicker at how gone he looks for you. "Why don't we get out of here, angel?" he asks, starting to lead you out of the locker room gently with a hand on your waist after slinging his equipment bag over his shoulder.
You nod in response. "Bye, guys," you yell over your shoulder to the others. "You guys did great as well!"
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You sat in the car, slushie in hand as you stare out the window.
You and Jake had spent the evening watching a movie at the theater before heading down to the bowling center to play a game against each other.
Now you two were in the car, driving to a place that only Jake knows where.
"Where are we even going?" You ask, curiosity piqued.
You turn your head towards Jake, watching the way his curls fell on to his forehead, how the streetlamps lit up his face with a glow, how his eyes concentrated on the road, and the way his veiny hands steered the car with graceful movements.
"Somewhere special, angel," he hums in response. He doesn't take his hands off the wheel, but s soft smile forms on his plump lips.
"Where?"
"You'll see."
You huff, slumping into the car seat with a pout, hoping that it'll coax an answer out of Jake. But all it does is make him chuckle.
After around 10-15 minutes, the car comes to a halt and Jake turns off the engine. He quickly hops out of the car, practically running to your side to open the door for you before you can do it.
"Thanks, Jakey," you stay, stepping out.
"Always, angel," he says, smiling.
He takes your hand in his and gently squeezes it as he shuts the car door and locks it. He leads you up a quiet hill. The hill is quiet and dark, illuminated by the moon and the stars. There's a soft breeze blowing, causing the grass to rustle as you two sit down at the top.
You feel your breath get knocked out of you, the view in front of you breathtaking. You can see the whole city from here in its entire magnificence: buildings climbing up to reach the sky; lights illuminating the place; trees in the far distance. It feels like Jake picked a glittering kingdom out of a fairytale and put it in front of you to admire.
"It's so pretty," you gasp.
"Like you, angel," he whispers. "That's why I wanted to bring you here."
"I love it," you say, a smile forming on your face as you turn to look at Jake. Your Jake who adores you so much. Your Jake who you feel extremely lucky to have in your life.
He leans in, giving you time to pull away as if you two hadn't been dating for the past three years and were about to kiss for the first time. Finally, his lips crash against yours. It's soft, gentle, and promising. Yet, as his lips pressed harder, it felt bittersweet, like a farewell.
As Jake pulled away, you could see it in his eyes. The same bittersweet feeling his lips had given you, painted in his brown eyes.
You frown.
"What's up, Jakey?" you ask, gently as worry clouds your eyes.
He sighs shakily, running a hand through his hair. He turns to sit facing you and you do the same.
"I can't be with you anymore," he says.
You go into shock as your mind registers his words. Your heart drops to your stomach. "W-What?"
"No! I mean I can be with you, but—I didn't mean it like that." Jake starts to panic, seeing the hurt in your eyes. "Can...Can you stand up for a second?" He asks, standing up.
You nod, allowing Jake to pull you up on to your feet. "What's going on, Jake?" You frown, folding your arms together as you demand an explanation.
"I have to go to Decelis Uni for college because the college here rejected me. So I have to move there."
"You mean you can't stay home?" You ask, your heart slowing down in relief, but still filled with tension.
"Yeah, that's what I meant." Jake looks down, chuckling. His cheeks are tinged pink with embarassment at having fumbled this. "But that doesn't mean I want to leave you."
Your eyes widen as you see Jake go down on one knee. "Jake, what are you doing?"
"Trust me, angel," he says, cutting you off curtly, although there was only warmth in his voice. He pulls out a black velvet box but doesn't open it.
"Since I'm moving away, I want to ask you something. I know it's only for a year until you graduate and come to Decelis too and we're together again. But I still want to ask you this."
"Y/n L/n," he starts, flipping the box open to reveal a gorgeous diamond ring. It's not huge and extravagant or tiny and plain, it's in between and absolutely stunning.
"Jake, I know you're 18, but I'm still 17," you gasp. "I can't marry you."
"I know," Jake laughs. "I'm not gonna ask you to marry me. I mean, I am, but not today."
You chuckle at that, blood rushing to your cheeks at the thought of Jake actually proposing to you one day.
"But I am asking whether you'll remain my loyal girlfriend the same way I'll remain your loyal boyfriend despite all the distance between us," he continues. "I know people say long-distance never works, but I want to make it work. For you. For us."
Jake pauses, trying to keep his voice steady. "I'm willing to put in all the work and effort I can to make it work if you say yes," he declares, brutally honest. "Will you stay my girlfriend even though I'm moving away?"
You can see by the way his eyes look at you filled with devotion and the way he pours his heart into his words that he means every single word he just said.
You know that if you break up with Jake right now just because he was moving away for college, it would be the biggest and stupidest mistake anyone could ever make in the history of humanity.
"Yes," you breathe out. It's a simple word. Soft and quiet; but it holds so many emotions.
"Did you just say 'yes'?" Jake asks, eyes brightening. He can't bring himself to believe that you actually said 'yes'.
"Yes, Jakey." You nod vigorously, laughter blooming from your throat.
Your words are everything Jake wants, he quickly takes your left hand, slipping on the promise ring on to your ring finger with careful movements before pressing a reverent kiss to your knuckles.
He gets back up on his feet with a sigh of relief and a bright, adorable smile on his face. "My knee was starting to hurt," he remarks playfully.
"Oh, shut up," you pout, wrapping your arms around his waist as Jake pulls you into a tight, warm hug.
"I'll stay your girlfriend no matter how far you are from me," you mumble, allowing yourself to relax in his arms. "You could be on the other side of the Earth and I'd still love you with all my heart."
"Really?" he asks, slightly pulling away to look down at you while flashing you a boyish grin. "'Cause I'd still do the same for you."
"You're such an idiot," you scoff to try and hide the effect his grin has on you, your heart racing.
"I'm your idiot," he states proudly.
Before you can reply to him, Jake's lips crashes against yours, his face tilting as your fingers weaved their way into his black hair. The way your lips fit against each others was almost like a key fitting perfectly in a lock, like they were made for each other and no one else.
Your last kiss tasted bittersweet, but this one tasted like cotton candy weaved out of promises of forever; sweet and exquisite as reality melted on each other's tongue.
Jake buries his head in the crook of your neck the moment you pull away so that you don't see his blushing face. His arms trail to the small of your back as he plays with the hem of his jersey on you.
"Y'know, I don't know what I would've done if you said 'no' to me today," Jake admits, voice muffled. "You're so amazing. I want to be with you forever."
"I love you so much, angel."
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taglist @chrrific @lezleeferguson-120
------ᝰ‧₊ written by ©amatariki 2025
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twiishaa · 4 months ago
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𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋‎♪ moments like these idol!riki x idol!reader, wc 365, for my love @daisynergy <3
ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 IT was well into the night, the only lights in your room being your phone, and the light hum of the TV. riki walked in, turning a dim lamp on. “you’ll need those big fat glasses if you look at your phone in the dark,” he said as you blinked at the sudden ‘brightness’ of the room. letting out a groggy sound of acknowledgement, you turned to look at your boyfriend. “oh. hi,” you smiled and turned your phone off. riki watched as you yawned, noticing the glitter on your eyelids. “your show was like, hours ago. you still haven’t taken your makeup off?” suddenly remembering you still had your makeup on, you went to touch your eyelashes – as if to check. “come on,” riki peeled you off your sofa with one pull. “i guess i can help you,” he said, still holding on to your wrist as he dragged you to the toilet. “i can do it myself!” you yelped. but deep inside, riki wanted to do this for you. he adored the smaller, domestic moments between you; it brought him a sense of peace and he wouldn't trade it for anything. they only became more precious when you two were far– when one of you were on tour on the other side of the world, unable to see each other for months at a time, or when it was comeback season, and you both had schedules lasting into the night. for some reason, riki wasn’t satisfied with being the richest. sure– it was nice; but it was moments like this, when he’s taking his girlfriend’s makeup off, gently rubbing off the remnants of eye glitter and mascara, that riki longed for the most– that made him the happiest man in the world. “there,” riki whispered as he placed a soft kiss on your forehead. as you lifted your head to look at him and your eyes made contact, riki’s heart swelled with love, the wind knocked out of his lungs. riki wasn’t a hopeless romantic, nor was he a dramatic man, but he was sure that he was born to spend his life with you, to hold you in his arms forever.
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note this is so self indulgent i WARNED YOUUU
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sweetbcgs · 6 months ago
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Heyy i've had this fic idea for a while 😫 have ya'll seen those tiktoks where like a person makes a certain someone sign autographs on their chest? And imagine that with Caitlin Clark and her s/o 😫 and also tattooing it after
AUTOGRAPH / caitlin clark
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warning : nothing
pair : caitlin clark x fem!reader
wc : 365
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Caitlin has seen a lot in her life as a popular basketball player. The amount of people cheering her on, even sobbing fans on the sidelines, but nothing could have prepared her for this.
"Are you like.. serious right now?" Caitlin blinked, a sharpie in her hand as she stared down at you, her fans and some teammates around them.
Her girlfriend of five years now grinned devilishly at her. "Dead serious."
"Babe, you're insane." Caitlin said, her voice low as she glances at her the people aorund them.
"No, I'm romantic." You corrected her before pointing at your chest. "Now come on. Right here, sign it. Don't you want the world to see how much you mean to me." You jutted out your bottom lip in a pout as a few of her teammates laughed.
"God, this is so ridiculous." She covered her face with her hand as she groaned before uncapping the marker. She leaned in, carefully scrawling her signature right over your heart as the crowd cheered in the background. "There, baby. Happy now?"
"Very," You replied, beaming as you tugged your shirt back into place. "See you when you get home, baby."
-
A week later, Caitlin was sitting on the couch as she scrolled through Tiktok waiting for you to come back and lay with her.
"Sooo.. What do you think?" You asked casually, making her look up to you in a tank top, your chest revealed.
She froze. Her sharpie signature was a tattoo now, right over your heart.
"Are you kidding me?" She asked in disbelif as she pulled you into her lap.
"Yeah, you signed it and I got it tattooed. Done deal." You said proudly, leaning back just a big so she could get a better look at it.
"God.. Do you know how many people saw that video?" She groaned and drug her hand down her face, a smile still on her face.
"Hmm. Yeah like a few million. Looks like you're stuck with me forver, Cait." You said proudly, wrapping your arms around her.
"It looks amazing, baby. Just didn't think you'd do it." She smiled and leaned in to kiss you.
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a/n: this was so funny to write ngl
tags : @mrsarnold @sweetluna20
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aquasoftware · 2 months ago
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𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐃𝐎𝐍’𝐓 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐌𝐘 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 ˳ᐟ
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FT | Waitress!Reader ✘ Kento N.
Desc | Kento Nanami prospers in routine—until it starts to feel like a cage. One night out with the help of Satoru turns into a quiet obsession when he meets a pretty waitress that becomes his new exciting adventure.
CW | Fluff, simp!Nanami, wingman!Satoru, love at first sight trope, slight cultural inaccuracy (tipping isn’t a thing in Japan, but roll with it <33)
WC | 1.2K ➜ ML
A/N : This is heavily based on Alicia Key’s song
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All Kento knew was his morning coffee with extra vanilla creamer, work, and the occasional stop at the local bakery.
In the late evenings, he’d settle into his cozy home—Laufey crackling on the record player while reading yet another romance novel, his typical routine, which repeated on loop all 365 days of the year.
However, that day-to-day predictability started to bore even someone like Kento—who thrived on the easiness of structure and quietly judged those without it.
Nowadays it felt as suffocating as a tie too tight around his neck.
Lately he’d stare at a paragraph for minutes on the page—realizing that none of the words had stuck in his brain. Often daydreaming about new exciting adventures while the world around him faded to white noise.
And could anything feel more adventurous than Satoru—of all friends he had—inviting him out to a retro diner?
Nope! that’s exactly why he came here with him, at least after some arm-twisting (and the promise of mouth watering garlic bread appetizers), he’d given in.
But the moment he saw you in a pastel-blue mini dress with a crisp white apron and black-and-white roller skates, strolling to table seven, all thoughts of garlic bread, and music humming from the jukebox vanished.
He studied you like a masterpiece come alive—every careful step, each tilt of your wrist as you balanced the menus with ballerina-like grace.
“Hiii!! I’m Y/n—your server for today. Welcome to Aqua’s Diner. How may I take your order?” A bright smile flourished on your lips, almost as flashy as your dangly earrings.
He felt the weight of your dreamy eye contact roaming towards only him as if poor Satoru was a ghost, maybe that was just one of his many daydreams though.
Breaking out of his thoughts, his hands rested on his slacks as you slid the menus across the table, before brushing your hair away from your face using your manicured nails. Then clicking your fancy red pen, you pulled out your notepad ready for orders.
He cleared his throat like it’d help the upcoming voice crack. “I would like…um…uh…”
His gaze darted between you and Satoru, heart thudding like a bass drum beneath his prussian-blue button-up.
“What would you recommend? I’ve never been here, so this is a new experience for me.” Kento asked, gulping as he fixed his collar with his sweaty fingertips.
“Ahh, first timer?” You mused, tapping the pen onto your chin. “Try The Hungry Shark—linguine Alfredo topped with parmesan, fresh basil and crab. It comes with garlic bread on the side.”
Kento gave a small grin “The name seems very misleading..” He half-joked, a soft chuckle escaping after “But I trust your call—I'll have that, please.”
You nodded, took Satoru’s order, and rolled away on your skates.
Satoru leaned in like a detective busting a case, eyebrows wiggling as he spread both hands on the table. “Oooohhhh—‘I trust your call,’ huh? What’s that about?”
“Satoru, calm down—it’s nothing like that,” Kento protested, as heat crept up his neck, blooming into a dusty rose atop his cheeks. He already regretted letting Satoru drag him out tonight.
The truth was unavoidable though, a lie detector would catch him, betraying him on the first question. He’d never been so flustered—or so alive—around anyone else.
Especially the constant stream of sending Satoru’s phone texts desperately asking to come back–seeing the waitress on Lennox street. Over and over, it became Kento’s new routine—and consumed his every thought.
Satoru’s phone would buzz continuously:
“Can we go back please? I need to see her again.”
“Lennox Street, right? Meet me there.”
He squared his shoulders, trying to sound firm, but his fingers shook the entire time. Every memory of the first day he saw you made his heart race at the thought of seeing your face again.
That Thursday evening it would mark their tenth time there, the neon sign of Aqua’s Diner glowed against the gathering dusk as the bell above the door jingled each time new customers sauntered in.
They sat by their usual window booth, the late-daylight softening the diner's edges, but Satoru noticed something.
Kento usually hated small talk—yet with you, he found excuses.
Every time you glided by their table—your skates singing smoothly on the linoleum—he’d throw his friend a pointed look and gear into, “Hey, have you heard Laufey’s Everything I Know About Love album?”
Or “Do you think the protagonist in my book made the right choice?” he’d ask Satoru, hoping you’d swoop into the conversation like a creative fairy godmother.
When your eyes lit up and you launched into your take, it felt like he’d scored the winning goal—and his crush shot straight to the clouds.
Satoru watched you both as you paused mid-discussion to refill his water glass, hair catching the overhead light and gleaming like spun silk.
Tonight, you’d tucked a few loose strands into a delicate colorful clip, and a thin chain of freshwater pearls peeked above your apron pocket—subtle touches, but enough to widen his grin in amused approval.
He shifted in his seat and caught Kento’s eye. He looked impossibly tense, sleeves rolled up to mid-forearm, as if he were daring you to notice how the soft lamplight traced every muscle.
He’d left an embarrassingly large tip on the table last time—another unspoken hint—and Kento was even wearing his glasses tonight, almost as if he’d rehearsed looking smarter just to impress you.
“That’s it,” Satoru muttered under his breath, though his tone was all warmth. He pushed back from the table. “I can’t take it anymore.”
You paused mid-pour, eyebrows lifted. “Satoru?”
He held up a hand in apology for what he was about to spill, then turned to Kento.
“Dude, you’ve been mooning over her every night—you roll your sleeves up, you flash her that bored-but-not-really look, you tip like you’re bribing her to personally solve Japan’s declining birth rate, and you barely even remember her name, enough! I’m going to say it.”
Kento’s jaw clenched, but there was no stopping Satoru now. He stood and cleared his throat—loud enough to make both of you look up.
“Maybe… I barely remember her name because I’m too busy admiring her,” he fired back, side eyeing him.
You slightly rolled forward, curiosity pouring in your eyes.
“See, exactly my point! my friend here—Kento—thinks you’re absolutely stunning.”
Your cheeks warmed as you turned to Kento, whose mouth had gone suddenly dry. You caught him fiddling with the cuff of his sleeve, then offering you a shy, crooked smile.
“Well,” you said, dipping your head with a playfully fiddling with your pearls, “I think your friend is pretty handsome, too.”
Before he could answer, you pressed the bill toward him—and the back of it read, in careful red-ink:
“If you’d like to see me outside my apron, call me.”
Satoru settled back with a triumphant nod and held up his hand for a high-five—only for Kento to stare so long at the paper that he completely missed it. His pupils widened, goosebumps rippling up his arms, and his heart thundered in his chest, fireworks exploding behind his ribs.
“I appreciate the offer,” he murmured, as if he were signing a contract.
“Kento, you’re so awkward. Oh my god,” Satoru shook his head in disbelief.
“And where’s my thank you? I’m practically a spring cupid.”
Hesitantly he whispered “Thank you.”
“Also I need a dessert to-go for this and all”
“Now you’re pushing it, Satoru.”
You just giggled at their little back-and-forth, then slid away to tend other tables.
Kento clumsily tucked the paper into his pocket, and tried to straighten his shirt—hard to focus on anything else, but thoughts of a wedding with you already rose in his head and you two weren’t even dating yet.
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Dividers/Boarders produced by | strangergraphics + kodaswrld.
Song written by Koi’lani/@aquasoftware. ©
REBLOGS, COMMENTS, AND LIKES ARE HEAVILY APPRECIATED!! THANK YOU <3 | ML
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bradleysass · 2 months ago
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judge - @into-the-jeggyverse - wc: 365
It’s cold in the clearing. Cold in the way that gets beneath your skin, no matter the layers of fabric or wards thrown up in desperation.
James stares at Regulus like he’s never seen him before. Maybe he hasn’t.
“Move,” Regulus says quietly, his wand still trained on the man collapsed at his feet. “James, I’m not going to ask again.”
James doesn’t move. He doesn’t even blink. There’s blood spattered across his cheek, red and angry against his freckled skin. “You’re not—” he chokes on the words. “You’re not going to kill him.”
Regulus’s lips twist into something like a smile, bitter and thin. “Aren’t I?”
“You can’t.” James steps forward, hands raised, wand forgotten at his side. “You can’t be judge and executioner, Reg. That’s not who you are.”
“You don’t know who I am.” Regulus’s wand doesn’t waver, but his voice does. “You never did.”
“I know you better than anyone,” James whispers, and suddenly he’s closer, close enough that Regulus can feel the heat of him, the raw desperation burning off his skin. “You don’t want this. You’re not him.” His gaze flicks down to the Death Eater gasping on the ground. “You’re not them.”
Regulus swallows. His fingers tighten around his wand. “He killed Evan.”
“I know.” James’s voice cracks. “And I hate him for it. But this—” He gestures at the scene, at the blood and the body and the endless cycle. “This won’t bring him back.”
The wand lowers. Just an inch. Just enough.
“I promised him,” Regulus murmurs, almost to himself. “I promised I’d make them pay.”
“You have.” James’s hand finds his. “You’ve already done more than anyone expected you to. But this?” He closes Regulus’s fingers over the wand, guiding it down. “You don’t have to carry this too.”
For a long moment, Regulus stares at the man wheezing in the dirt, at the insignia on his robes, at the hollow triumph waiting in the act.
Then he lets out a shaky breath and drops the wand entirely.
James catches him as he sinks to the ground, arms wrapping tight around him like an anchor.
“You’re not them,” James says again, soft against his ear.
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blue-jisungs · 5 months ago
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⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚ SO THIS IS LOVE…? 🧸ྀི — myungjae realizing he loves you ( wc 365 )
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[ extras ! ] pissing LMFAO ??, they are dating. could be read as both (non)idol myungjae! + implied they are neighbors
ੈ✩‧₊˚ note ! me when love in mundane acts and everyday activities and silly moments an d and and--- (someone lock me up i am not sane)
@kstrucknet 🪽
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“hi, can i piss at yours?”
jaehyun was staring at you, wide eyed. he barely opened the door and had time to register it’s you, when you hit him with a rather weird question.
“what?” he breathed out, blinking.
“piss. you know, urine. the thing that comes out of your bladder–“ you started explaining, wriggling a little.
jaehyun scoffed, reaching to fix your half undone scarf. you were clearly in a rush, hair disheveled by the wind and cheeks rosy.
“yeah, i know what piss is, just…” he snorted, stepping aside, giving up with a small sigh “come on in”
“thanks!” you yelped and almost threw your bag at him, shimmying your coat and scarf on your way to the toilet.
your boyfriend smiled to himself, shaking his head. you could’ve easily just go to your place – you were living next door, literally. but you still decided to go to his. and just the absurdity of this situation made him chuckle.
“you know, i wanted to pee really badly when i was on the bus i couldn’t hold it anymore!” you yelled from the toilet as he closed the door and started picking up the clothes you dropped. “by the way, there’s garlic bread in my bag, you can eat it!”
jaehyun dived in and found it. it was cold as stone, probably due to the temperature outside.
“it might be halfway eaten though… i was hungry!” you continued chatting with him naturally.
jaehyun started at the cold garlic bread in his hand, the bite marks shaped like a heart. a lopsided smile painted on his face, a realization blooming in his head.
he loves you.
he could get used to such silly mundane moments. or rather, chaotic ones.
“by the way, there’s a package at the door!”
he looked up and saw you, blinking.
“what?” you asked, tilting your head “i washed my hands, i promise!”
“i… it’s nothing” he huffed and gently knocked the countertop with the cold bread “let me reheat this. you can grab the package, it’s probably the clothes we ordered”
when you left, humming a random song, he was nodding to himself.
so this is what love feels like.
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masterlist <3
taglist. @slytherinshua ,, @weird-bookworm
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kiss4tell · 2 months ago
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𝐃𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐊, simon riley.
cw: oral sex (f receiving), mild overstimulation, pussydrunk!simon. wc: 365
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Simon’s never quiet when he’s got his mouth on you.
He’s usually so composed, so cold—whether he’s behind a rifle or walking through blood—but that all falls away the second he’s between your legs. That mask of his, so feared and revered, always comes off the moment you start undressing. The only thing he wears when he’s on his knees is desperation.
Right now, you’re sprawled out on the couch, legs over his shoulders, one of his big hands splayed low on your belly to hold you still while the other stays hooked under your thigh. His tongue is relentless. Wide, slow licks, dragging up your slit with obscene wet sounds that echo in the quiet room. Every time he flicks over your clit, you hear the low groan in his throat—gravelly and shameless. Like he can’t help himself.
And maybe he can’t. He’s drunk on it. Addicted. Face buried so deep in your cunt it’s like he’s trying to breathe you in. Messy, moaning, rutting his hips against the cushions just to take the edge off.
You can feel him groaning more—vibrations that shake all the way up your spine. His nose nudges your clit as he dips his tongue inside, and the breath he exhales is hot, damp, shuddering. He mouths at you like he’ll never get another chance. Sucks your clit so gently and then so hard you see stars. He keeps going even when your legs shake around his ears, even when you’re whining, overstimulated and wet all the way down your thighs.
And he just moans. Keeps moaning.
Low, hoarse sounds that build every time your hips grind into his face. Little whimpers that slip from his throat when you tug his hair. And when you come—gasping, clenching, dizzy—he groans into you like he’s the one falling apart.
He doesn’t stop.
Doesn’t lift his head.
Doesn’t speak.
Just keeps licking through your aftershocks, slow now, more tender than before. Like he’s savoring every last drop. His hips twitch against the cushions again, like he could finish just like this, face slick and buried in you, his moans muffled by your pussy and his pride long gone.
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ethereacals · 11 months ago
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10 Things I HATE About: You.
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summary: James is starting to get desperate when Lily continues to reject his attempts to date her, as she reveals she's not allowed to date until her completely opposite twin sister does. which seems highly unlikely, (thats why its such a good rule). so James comes up with a grand plan to get Sirius to date her, what could go wrong?
(literally just the story of 10tihay)
wc: 1,585
pairings: evans!slytherin!reader (jeezus thats a mouthful) x sirius black
tropes: grumpy x sunshine, because of a bet
contents: angst? (if that's what we call it) to comfort, happy ending, james doesn't think before he does something, mulciber is sexist (but what’s new)
a/n: this will come in two maybe three parts so stay tuned!
Pt.1-3
(ON INDEFINITE HIETUS)
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TO PUT THINGS LIGHTLY: you didn't give a damn about your bad reputation.
Lily on the other hand? did, very much so.
Which is one key reason she didn't appreciate James Potter chasing her around like a lost puppy dog 24/7 365.
Yet she was (unfortunately) falling for James, but couldn't do anything about it since she was forbidden to date by her father until you did, her twin sister.
you guys were insanely different, like night and day.
Lily was a goody-two-shoes, good grades, kept her mouth shut, a clean record.
You on the other hand- while you had also good grades, your record was not clean.
but between having shouting matches with Lucius and Severus about their sexist tendencies or muggleborn rights:
you'd been in detention quite a few times.
but people always seemed to think you were a scary, bitch of a slytherin.
but it's not like many of the slytherin's liked you always, you were a muggleborn after all.
not to mention; relationships made you want to hurl.
and Lily detested you for that.
"Can't you just be a normal person with normal person interests for once!?"
"now, where's the fun in that?" You reasoned from your spot on the library's couch.
"Y/n, Please? You know I like him." Lily begged, her bottom lip jutted out in a stupid pout.
"And? You shouldn't, Lils. He's actually daft." She groaned irritatingly.
"Where are you from? Planet Loser?"
"As apposed to Planet 'Look At Me, Look At Me!'"
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"Sirius, Sirius- Please!" James pleaded from his position below Sirius, up on top his knees.
"James, you are quite literally asking me to do the impossible."
"Sirius- She can't date, until Y/N does... and- and you, you my handsome friend- can date her- so I can date Lily!"
James had his hands holding desperately onto Sirius'.
"500 Galleons." Sirius ripped his hands away from James, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Deal."
They shook on it.
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You found it quite odd, how it seemed like you were being stalked all of the time.
You were at quidditch practice when a boy with medium length, raven hair came up to you.
you knew exactly who this was.
"Hi, love." he took your sweaty hand and placed a soft kiss on the back of it.
"Sirius, Sirius Black." he flashed that 'Sirius Black Grin'.
"I'm well aware." You smiled begrudgingly.
"You don't seem incredibly happy to see me, Evans." He just kept on grinning, grinning like he won the Quidditch World Cup or something.
"I'm not, Black. Please leave me alone." You gathered up your things quickly, wanting to get out of his sight.
Sirius seemed a bit put down, nobody had ever been this insistent to get away from him.
usually girls would through themselves at him.
not you though.
he liked that.
very much so.
He cleared his throat. "So, Friday then?"
you stopped walking, turning your head back to him.
"Friday? what about Friday?" You scoffed.
"I'll pick you up on Friday to go on a date."
Damn, that was smooth, even you had to admit it.
"No thank you." you weren't sure what emotion to feel at that moment- embarrassment, annoyance, irritation.
but so far, his plan wasn't working.
but it will.
you had walked off long before he left the pitch, before returning to James in the courtyard.
He slumped against a tree, sighing with annoyance.
"We're screwed." He groaned pessimistically.
"Come on, Pads. Be a bit optimistic."
"We're screwed!" He cheered sarcastically.
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The days following were odd, and more annoying then usual.
Sirius Black wouldn’t cease following you around.
Slytherin had a Quidditch Game that day, and you really couldn’t stand Mulciber and Avery’s constant berating of the fact a girl was Slytherins seeker.
“You know— Mulciber, L/N is actually one of the best seekers we’ve had at Hogwarts in years.” Sirius explained proudly.
“but it seems that you can’t wrap your utterly sexist brain around that.” He cooed, Mulciber turned as red as lava.
“She’s only there for eye candy, Black. you understand she’s a filthy mud blood, right?” Mulciber barked, Sirius then wondered; with all this barking he’s doing, maybe he’d like me to throw a stick?
“and what has that got to do with absolutely anything?”
“come on, Black. don’t act like you are this muggles rights activist, you’re a Black.”
Sirius hated being reminded of that fact, he had ran away over a year ago.
“and— besides, L/n is only on the Quidditch Team because she has good tits.”
Sirius clenched his fists, before he shot towards Mulciber in an angry rage.
only he was allowed to say you had good tits.
the punches flew as Avery stood at his spot by the wall, his face not having any color what so ever. he looked like he had seen a ghost.
obviously, all good things must come to an end. as McGonagall stormed out of her office to take points away from both houses, and to instruct Avery to take Mulciber to the hospital wing and then to Detention along with Sirius.
in Sirius’ book, it was worth it.
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“he got detention? for you?” Dorcas repeated for about the seventh time in the past three minutes.
“Yes, Dorcas.” You were disgusted by what Mulciber had said about you.
“come on, sugar. everyone here knows you have lovely tits.” Barty mentioned from his place shoved (lovingly) into Evan’s armpit while gnawing on his bicep.
“okay— yeah, whatever. but i certainly don’t need to hear about it from Mulciber and his pet rat.”
You bid farewell to your friends before returning to your dorm.
and you couldn’t wait to plop down on your bed and watch a movie, that was your ideal thursday night.
until something was in the way, and by something i mean a giant bouquet of flowers and by in the way i mean they were right smack in front of your door.
“You have to be fucking kidding me.”
you held a tiny note in your hand, having plucked it from the flowers seconds earlier.
“Dear Y/n.”
“don’t listen to Mulciber, he’s harmless. (and jealous that you actually made the quidditch team.) i siriusly (haha, get it?) want to take you out on the finest of dates tomorrow night, would you please accept?”
(: -sirius b. ps. you looked very nice today.
a smile cracked from your lips, before shaking it off and picking the flowers up off the floor.
a date? with you?
why would he want a date with you? where was this obsession coming from?
you supposed you could do it as an act of public service, (to yourself that is) since it would probably not be enjoyable enough for the both of you.
and he did just beat someone up for you.
so why not indulge in him for an evening?
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Friday Night had rolled around and you were nervous, he’d only been talking to you since monday and you weren’t sure if you shared the feelings.
but after that night, everything changed.
Sirius was sweet, lovable, and overall not how he seemed.
On the outside, you perceived him as this immature, prankster of a boy who hadn’t gotten enough attention as a child so he felt the need to beg for it everywhere he went.
but on the inside? he was soft, kind, and on top of that he was a gentlemen (which was very unexpected).
“I’m sorry.” you noted.
“sorry for what, dollface?” he chuckled.
“I misjudged you.” Sirius’ brain clogged with worry.
“how did you perceive me before?”
“well— i thought you were immature.” you began, not easing his worries one bit.
“and… i thought this was all a big prank.”
“it’s not.” he quickly answered, but it was, he was lying.
it wasn’t a prank per say, but it was a bet.
which may have been worse.
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"Pads!" James yelped, sprinting towards him once he came back from your date.
"Prongs." Sirius greeted him cordially.
"So? How'd it go?" He sat down like he was the best friend character in a 2000s movie hearing about the main characters date with her crush.
"Good, She seems like a nice person."
"Pads, you seem all down in the dumps." James frowned, wrapping an arm casually around his best friend's shoulders.
"What's got your mind going?" Remus did the same as the former, leaning onto him gently.
"well- I'm not sure about this, I may be a bastard but I don't want to hurt her. She thinks I'm being serious."
The worst part about this was: that Sirius was already feeling serious about it, as Serious as Sirius could be.
Seriouser then he's ever Sirius'd.
but you didn't deserve this.
and boy, did he feel shit about it.
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nariism · 1 year ago
Text
wherever you are, wherever you may be — i. rin
soulmates (name au) + "i'm done waiting."
synopsis. itoshi rin meets you under a sky full of fireworks. he spends the next 6 years of his life trying to convince himself that he doesn't love you. you spend the next 6 years giving him every reason why he should.
wc. 12.4k (i need to close my eyes and sleep for a while)
notes. huge thank you to ellie (@hyomagiri) and mari (@saetoshi) for helping me with this 🥹 this fic actually put me through it and i'm so grateful to both of them for their support 💗
— for my beloved @ode2rin 💐 | event masterlist ✉️
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2024
Every year on the seventh day of the seventh month, Itoshi Rin finds himself standing at the daunting entrance to his local shrine.
The tradition is completely beneath him—something childish that he grumbles about under his breath despite letting you drag him all the way out here with soft eyes watching your smile.
Tanabata is the festival of stars. Of love.
It is a story his mother used to whisper to him as they watched the night sky in awe, pretending that the galaxy was collapsing in on itself to allow for a romantic midnight rendezvous between two lovers.
It’s something far too sappy for his liking.
But the food is okay, he supposes, and it’s a good opportunity to get out of the house and spend time with you which he seldom has time to do now that he’s back in his training season.
There were too many things about it that he loathed: the screaming children that would bump into his legs; the way his ears would stay ringing for days after the festival ended; how you could always convince him to come as if you were some sort of hypnotic devil in disguise, and how thoroughly wounded his pride would be at that fact.
However, his least favourite part of the festival by far is writing down his wish for the year on a scrap piece of paper and hanging it around a bamboo tree. One, because he can never for the life of him think of anything meaningful to wish for. And two, because he isn’t sure he even believes in that sort of thing.
Rin is struggling again this year, pencil lightly scratching his temple as he thinks.
He’s painfully aware that he’s never put so much thought into this before, but you seemed so excited to come all the way here before heading to the festivities that he couldn’t possibly let you down.
His wish dawns on him then, something he wants to do before the next time he makes the climb all the way back up here 365 days from now.
“Hey,” your voice calls out quietly. “What did you wish for?”
“What did you wish for?” Rin quickly refutes.
You cast your narrowed eyes from the side, tilting your little slip of yellow paper away from him.
“Only if I get to see yours first.”
Normally, he would give in to you right away. His resolve when it comes to you is embarrassingly weak. But there’s no way for him to explain himself. No way he could show you the words he’s written lest he hurt his ego.
He stubbornly folds up the piece of paper and shoves your face away. All you do is laugh and he feels terribly warm.
“No peeking,” he tells you when you kiss across his fingertips.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2018
A name appeared for Itoshi Rin when he turned thirteen years old.
He remembers the day well—it was hard to forget, anyway. As much as he wanted to focus on the burning of the name etching its way down his skin, he couldn’t. Not when he was blinking snow out of his lashes and watching his brother’s retreating back.
Rin likes to think that the universe fucks with him in any way that it can.
Maybe he had done something terrible in his past life and this was its karmic retribution, or maybe he was just unlucky.
What he does know is this: the name on his pinky only reminds him of all the things he ever lost.
Every syllable struck needles into his heart—a painful memory of crawling after the tracks of the wheels Sae left behind with his luggage until gravel and ice were stuck under his nails. Or worse, the clawing of his throat as they sat across from each other at dinner—the way he didn't even smile when Rin announced to his parents that his soulmate mark had appeared while his mother cried out in joy.
In fact, Sae didn’t talk to him for the rest of his visit. He remembers that hurt the most.
The name had haunted him for all the remaining years of his life—a forced memory that he wished he could forget. There came with it a feeling of loneliness that crushed him despite the proof on his pinky that there was another soul wandering the earth that would fix him.
He refused to believe it.
Only revenge would fix him. Only proving himself better would heal the cracks in his heart. Only beating Sae. Sae, Sae, Sae. His brother’s name had been repeated so many times that it was easy to ignore the other burning his skin.
In all those years he found it easy to cast aside his soulmate. To ignore it even if it hurt.
So he wonders why it’s so bad tonight.
He’s done everything he could think of: slathering cooling ointment down his finger to stop the searing, wrapping it in a cast to prevent himself from admiring it for too long, even tying a wish to a piece of bamboo hoping it would disappear.
A finger snaps in front of his face, drawing his attention to his teammates in front of him. Both look equally amused.
“You’re dreaming,” Isagi muses. “You’ve been spacing out all night. Is everything okay?”
“I’m fine,” Rin mutters, swatting his teammate’s hand away from him. He had been staring again, longingly eyeing the way the letters danced down his skin. “Just thinking.”
“About?”
“None of your business.”
“Yeesh, it’s not good to keep things bottled up, you know?”
“You’re annoying,” Rin glowers before it melts back into indifference. “I’m fine,” he reiterates.
Isagi seems unconvinced, as he usually is when Rin is being mysteriously vague about what’s on his mind. He and Bachira share a tentative glance before sighing and shaking their heads.
“Well… okay,” he finally yields. “We’re going to get some snacks before the fireworks start. If you’re going to sulk then at least stay put and do it here so we can find you again.”
“Yeah,” Rin grumbles, already making an escape plan. “Whatever. Will do.”
As soon as the boys are out of sight, he turns heel and hurries away. The crowd is driving him crazy and he needs somewhere quiet so he can stare at his hands until his eyes are dry.
He comes to a pond situated just outside of the festival grounds, deep water glimmering under the moon and the passing lanterns.
Plopping down on the bench, he hunches over onto his knees with his elbows and takes a deep breath. It instead comes shallow, as if someone has just punched him in the gut. 
It’s then that he realizes he’s not alone.
Your yukata is muddy, fabric soaked and dripping at the sleeves though you don’t seem to care or even notice. You look frustrated for some reason, lip curled into a concentrated frown while you plunge your hands into the mud around the edge of the water.
Away from the crowds of people, he can hear the summer song of cicadas chirping all around. Your hands dip in and out of the water, quiet splashes filling the rest of the silence on top of the distant buzz of children laughing.
It’s just you and him. Something primal inside of him rages, pounding against his chest until it feels like he’s suffocating.
Run. Run. Run.
His legs jerk, urging him to stand up and leave, but he feels glued down to the bench—tethered where he sits and forced to watch you repeatedly sink your hands into the muddy waters.
No more than five minutes must pass as you both ignore each other, yet it feels like an eternity stretches by. 
Finally, you pipe up.
“You’re scaring them,” you tell him plainly.
His head whips in your direction at your voice, soft and careful. His teal eyes narrow at you. “Huh?”
Your frown deepens, turning to look at him with your hands still submerged. “The frogs.”
“Come again?”
“Your vibes. It’s scaring the frogs away.”
His eye twitches.
“Ever consider that you’re just dogshit at catching them?”
“Excuse me?”
“And look at you, making a total mess of yourself. Don’t you care that you have to go home looking like that?” He presses, leering at you like an insect he’s about to crush under his heel. You simply stare at him, expression blank.
Huffing, you tear away from him and sink your hands beneath the mud. “No. I don’t.”
He watches in silence as you sift around for a moment before pulling your hands up, a smile slowly morphing into your face.
“I got one…” You breathe, looking more elated than he thinks you should. “I really caught one.”
“First time?” He quips sarcastically. A part of him wonders why he hasn’t gotten up and left you altogether yet.
“Cut me some slack,” you complain, eyeing him from the side again. You gently run a finger along the back of the frog, trying not to scare it away. “I haven’t done this in forever.”
“Clearly.”
You snort. “Yeah. Clearly.”
Rin looks at you quizzically, puzzled at your sudden change in demeanor. You seem… softer. Less agitated, at the very least. You’re gazing at the frog adoringly, as if it had somehow solved all of your problems and was dragging you into another world.
Any retort he had ready to shoot at you dies in his mouth. The anger rising in his chest extinguishes in the blink of an eye, and a deep hush settles over you as he watches in curiosity.
For a moment, the universe goes quiet. He’s gotten so used to having everything on his mind all at once that the silence is almost unnerving.
He once believed that his world would end with an injury that never healed quite right, or when he was too old for any team to want him.
He once believed that his world would end when he could no longer imagine the feel of a ball between his palms.
He once believed that his world would end the day he couldn’t play football anymore—that the only thing that would ever kill him was if the chance of standing alongside his brother died with him.
But he was wrong.
Itoshi Rin’s world ends with the bellow of a firework.
In a few years, he would think of this stretch of a few seconds fondly. He would squeeze you a little tighter with his chin resting on your shoulder, staring up at a colourful sky. He would think it was poetic, in a way, that you were the one who painted his world in the same hues of shimmering gold.
Rin remembers, though, that only one thought had crossed his mind.
I’m so screwed.
He can see every fine detail of your face, illuminated in all the colours of the rainbow. And he can’t help but think you are the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. He can trace each intricate curve of your nose to your chin to the surprised parting of your lips; the way your lashes flutter as you blink rapidly, tensed from the sudden explosion.
The light fades faster than it appeared, yet it feels like a millennium has passed. The reverbing echo of the firework crackles across the sky, thundering in his ears so loud that he can feel it pounding in his chest.
(Or is that his heart? He can’t tell. He feels dizzy.)
Darkness envelops your bodies again, save for the dim glow of distant lanterns. Every part of you is seared into his memory, a floating image when he blinks.
The frog leaps from your hands back into the water, leaving nothing but ripples behind.
You stay there with your hands outstretched, looking lonely under the dark sky. Another one goes off above your heads, signalling the start of the display.
“There you are, Rin!” Bachira and Isagi come rushing over from the path, excited smiles and mirth bubbling in their laughs as they approach. “We thought you went home without us already!”
Rin slowly blinks out of his reverie. For a second, he glances in your direction again just to catch your eyes. 
“I almost did,” he grumbles, forcing himself not to stare.
“Fireworks are starting!” Isagi yanks Rin to his feet and begins dragging him away before he can even protest.
Without turning around, he can feel the weight of your eyes in the back of his head. There’s an unfamiliar ache in his chest, and the name etched down his pinky burns infinitely hot.
Later at home, he stares at the spot where Sae used to sit back when he still came to Japan for anything other than to take a new passport photo.
“My soulmate’s name showed up,” he had mumbled that night to break the tense silence. It was strange that he still felt like he owed his brother that much—to make his visit as normal as possible despite having his heart carved open.
Sae only looked at him blankly, spoon halting just above his bowl. He was eerily still, quietly deciding how to react. Then,
“Good for you,” he said. And nothing more.
Rin squeezes his eyes shut and he feels warmth rolling down his cheeks. He quickly wipes the tears away, pretending as if they never existed.
He spends the rest of the night trying to forget your face.
(And the next year trying to recreate it in his dreams.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2019
Rin makes it another 275 days before he finally remembers every piece of the puzzle that is your existence.
He saw you in his sleep. The back of your head, anyway.
You were sitting in his favourite café, at the table he claimed for himself right by the window. You ordered a coffee but let it sit for so long that the ice melted. Then, you wiped up the condensation rolling down the frosty glass with your finger.
Rin watched you from afar, observing you the way he wished he did last summer.
Maybe then he could have dived deep into the recesses of his brain to remember why exactly you struck him so. But there he was, stuck watching the back of your head as you gazed out the window.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Your fingers drummed mindlessly against the wooden table, reciting a rhythm just slightly louder than the pounding of his own heart. 
“Can you leave me alone?” He finally called out, hoping it would stop your incessant beating.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
“You’re annoying me,” he hissed. Annoying for disturbing his peace and quiet. Annoying for plaguing his dreams even after all these days.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
“Seriously,” he grunted, standing up from his seat so fast that the chair scraped horribly against the wooden floor. Still, you didn’t pay him any mind, instead more interested in the faceless people walking by. “Knock it off!”
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
He bit the inside of his cheek in hesitation, the itch in the back of his mind ever present. “What’s your name?”
Silence.
You finally turned his way. Slowly. Agonizingly slow.  And Rin was right—you were still so beautiful, 275 days later.
Grinning at him big and bright, you almost seemed to collapse in on yourself with joy. Like a star about to implode, or maybe more akin to a firework.
Either way, his breath was stolen from him.
You silently mouthed your name, making sure he saw every vowel and accentuated syllable. Warmth flooded him in every way—probably brought on by the racing of his heart.
It was impossible that his soulmate was someone like this. Someone whose smile looked like it could heal even the deepest wounds.
You grabbed his attention again with a big wave of the arms, and he watched in anticipation.
“You’re—”
Rin followed your mouth as you sounded out the words without a voice.
“—smiling!”
He reached up to run his fingers along his bottom lip. And you were right, he realized, as he traced it midway up his cheek.
(When did he start smiling?)
(Why?)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Rin thinks about you just as much in the waking world as he does in his dreams.
It’s spring, though snow is still settled over the eaves of homes that he passes on the way to the grocery store. Apparently the winter cold is supposed to be especially long and bitter this year, permeating until mid-May.
He stares at his feet as they mark the virgin snow, decorating his sneakers white and making his feet cold.
Did you walk through the same snow this morning?
Then, when he’s going through the motion of smelling the bottom of pineapples at the store:
Do you like pineapple? What if you’re allergic?
(He shakes his head and puts them away. He suddenly isn’t craving it.)
His obsession with you has only intensified as the year has gone on. If you ever peered into his mind, he would receive a well-deserved slap across the face.
The soulmate mark engraved down his pinky has never bothered him so badly.
It’s like you’re constantly with him—a ghost haunting him, or perhaps more like a curse. Thinking about you takes up unnecessary space in his head. Space that should be dedicated to football, and football only.
He's about to go home so he can make a list outlining the ways he can forget about you.
(Ironic, he knows, but in all honesty he already exhausted all of his options from his first list.)
But then he comes to a stop outside of his favourite café. It looks the same, even has the same advertisements plastered in the window as the last time he was here.
He hesitates at the door, but when he walks in it smells the same. It's decorated the same. Not a single table is out of place.
He walks up to his regular spot, runs his fingers along the wood where he remembers you tapping in his dream.
There's no sign of your existence here.
Rin shakes his head in annoyance, cursing himself out in his head because he was stupid enough to think he would run into you here.
Then disappointment floods his body, like a dam had been released in his chest and it's flowing unstoppably to every piece of him.
(Wait, why is he disappointed? He really needs to take a nap.)
He runs his hand through his hair as a nervous reflex, simultaneously relieved and irritated that you're nowhere to be seen.
It takes him a minute to recollect himself, to realize that he probably looks like a crazy person just standing beside an empty table like a lost child who doesn't know where to go, and decides to just go home.
He pulls into the line to get a drink for his walk home when—
"Thanks!"
His heart drops.
You waltz out of the back, tying your apron around your waist as you exchange spots in the break room with one of your coworkers.
Rin is about to die, seriously. You must be new here, since he's been to this café more times than he can count and he's never seen you before. Or was it that he was specifically looking out for you this time?
Whatever the reason, he's dumbfounded.
“Hey,” your acknowledgment makes him freeze in his spot. “Frog guy?”
He looks at you stupidly, rubbing his eyes like a cartoon character as if he’s imagining you standing right in front of him.
His gaze drifts down to your name tag, fresh and newly printed with white marker. Signed at the end is a little flower, petals swirled into tiny hearts.
Your existence before him is undeniable.
"Um. Yeah," he sputters in disbelief.
"I..." You clear your throat, looking as bewildered as he feels. "I didn't think I'd see you again."
'You're my soulmate. Of course we'd run into each other,' he thinks to himself. Out loud, though:
"Yeah. Me neither."
The person behind him in line coughs quietly, impatiently tapping their foot. Rin takes the hint and quietly tells you what he wants. You lean in across the counter to hear him better, and his face grows warm.
Once you fill in the boxes on the cup, you place it down and move it to the side for someone to fill. It catches his eye immediately.
Itoshi Rin is scribbled neatly down the side of his cup.
“How did you...?”
You awkwardly shift in your spot, evidently embarrassed as you fiddle with the strings of your apron. Then, with your own hands.
“W-Well…”
His eyes dare to drop down to where your thumb is nervously slathering up and down the name on your pinky.
“Oh.”
"Sorry, I just figured—"
"It's fine," he interrupts. Your mouth snaps shut.
Tense silence stretches thin in the air, ready to shatter at any moment. But for some reason, he feels as though he's choking on nothing.
You fumble over the emptiness, quickly snatching up the cup to make his drink yourself after deciding it's too awkward to just stand there.
He watches you in a daze, half shaken and half in awe. Never in a million years would he have thought a dream would lead him back to you.
When you turn back around with a full cup, you look equally stunned. 
“Itoshi—”
“Rin. It’s just Rin.”
You look at him in surprise, lashes fluttering rapidly as you let it sink in.
It's not your fault. You don't know that it's a sore spot that he just so happens to share the same last name with the person he despises most in the world.
It's not your fault that he has a quick temper and his voice raises slightly, enough to make you flinch back just a tiny bit.
And it's definitely not your fault that it stings so much—that he had expected you to speak to him as if you'd already known him for a lifetime and not as if you were just two strangers looking at each other from across a bar counter.
“O-Okay," you take a deep breath, cheeks puffed out and expression unreadable.
You slide the cup across the counter and he catches it in his hand.
He debates whether or not he should say more, like apologize for snapping at you. But then someone calls you by your name, and the way it rolls so beautifully off their tongue catches him off guard.
"Sorry. See you, Rin," you smile sweetly. Maybe a little awkwardly, a small step toward the one he dreamed about. And his heart is set in motion.
Rin decides that today won't be the day.
Another day, he'll be brave enough to crack a joke so dry that you try and scrub his name off your skin. And another day, he will ask for your number because, yeah, you might be the most alluring person he's ever met.
As he turns to take his leave after just staring at the spot you were standing in for a solid few seconds, he can hear some of the other baristas clamouring for you.
He doesn't want to look. Really, honestly, he doesn't. 
But he does anyway.
It's just a quick glance over his shoulder—nothing more than a fleeting moment as he takes the chance to look at you one more time.
Those two seconds is all it takes for him to realize just how much trouble he's in.
You're laughing big and toothy, waving your hand in front of your face dismissively as your coworkers poke fun at how flustered you are. Then your hands are clasped over your stomach and you've doubled down a little in your awkward fit.
His heart has never beat so loud in his own ears.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Itoshi Rin used to smile just for the sake of smiling, once upon a time.
He had aunties who would pinch him by the cheek and fawn over him, cooing about how he looked just like his mother. How his face would cherub and the apples of his cheeks were bright red. Even when he grew out of his baby face, people would tell him how wonderful his smile was.
Sae rarely ever smiled, so it was something exclusive. He never felt like he was standing in his shadow. It was special—the kind of praise only one Itoshi would know.
Rin has forgotten how to smile like that.
He smiles to be polite to his family, if ever. Even then, it's not like he owes them that much. At some point, it became too much effort. And he had no reason to do it.
It was always a tiny thought bothering him in the back of his mind:
I'll never meet my soulmate if I'm always scowling like this.
He thought that was what he wanted, anyway. He wouldn't need to worry about running into his soulmate if no one ever looked his way. If everyone feared him enough not to spare him a second glance.
He doubts everything he ever thought as he sits on the edge of his bed staring at his desk.
It's lit up by a single lamp, shining down on his empty coffee cup like a spotlight opened up by the heavens themselves.
Your phone number is written just below his name.
Rin had almost tossed it into the trash without a second thought earlier in the day. He would have, if it weren't for the loose dog that blitzed by him and made him drop it.
Fate just loves to mess with him.
He picked it up and his thumb had stopped over the number. It was written so small, as if you had wanted him to miss it. Or perhaps you wanted to test destiny yourself—to see if the planets would align and he would discover your seven digits there for him to find.
And now he's home. He's been home, just looking. Contemplating. Stressing.
He migrates from the edge of the bed and settles into his desk chair. Then he gets up, moves back to the bed, and flops down. An endless cycle, back and forth, pushing and pulling.
Rin plops down onto his desk seat and sighs in frustration, ruffling his hair around before his forehead slams into the table.
Every part of his mind screams at him to stop. To toss the cup away and forget today ever happened. His head raises from his arms and he stares at the set of numbers illuminated on the paper, taunting him. 
Finally, he exhales through his nose, sitting up straight and reaching for the cup to toss. His fingers delicately brush along your phone number.
“So dumb…” He huffs, eventually finding his phone instead and opening his contacts.
It’s nearly midnight. He tries to imagine your face as you wait by your phone for a message from him, that stupidly hopeful glimmer in your eyes, and he feels sick to his stomach as he sends it.
Rin: hey. it’s rin.
He throws his phone down on the desk again, screen down so he can’t cringe at himself. A few minutes pass in complete silence as he sulks.
He considers that you may have gone to bed already, or you were offended by the fact that he ignored your offer to connect all day and instantly blocked him. Maybe you thought he never saw your number at all.
Then his phone buzzes. His body moves on autopilot, snatching it up faster than he can realize what he’s doing. He’s halfway through the embarrassing thought that he just immediately read your message after you sent it as your text sinks in.
Unknown: hi! it’s great to hear from you ヾ(〃^∇^)ノ
Unknown: i was starting to think you were never gonna text lol
Rin: i wasn’t
He chews his lip for a moment before quickly following up:
Rin: but i changed my mind. just cause.
Unknown: hahaha got it got it. ‘just cause’ (˘◡˘)
Unknown: rin
Unknown: wait nvm
Unknown: whatever
Unknown: rin
Rin: what
Unknown: let’s get coffee ^ ^
He stares at the screen in disbelief, watching the typing bubble pop up and disappear again and again. He can imagine again what kind of smile you must have on your face right now, or maybe you look flustered, or maybe this all means nothing to you at all and this is your way of being polite.
Regardless of the reason, he eventually types out his response.
Rin: ok
Christ, he’s so tepid.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2020
He comes to memorize every part of you, like how the sun kisses the horizon and the moon knows the tides.
Intimately, almost—if he didn’t overthink the way your touch lingered on him he could easily ignore the way it made his heart pound in his ears.
Rin learns the feeling of your fingers against his skin as you compress an ice pack to his knee. He knows your laugh—can pick apart sarcasm from genuine cheer unlike most other people he encounters. He’s never been good at reading people yet for some reason you’ve become an open book for him. 
It’s not fair that you’ve ensnared him this way, that he can’t seem to run from you (because his favourite coffee is from your café and he can’t be bothered to find a new place). That he finds himself instinctively reaching over to his phone when he can’t sleep (he has to make sure his alarms are on, might as well text you goodnight while he’s at it). And you’ve become annoyingly comfortable (he doesn’t have an excuse for this one—your lap is just conveniently a very nice place to rest his head).
He must be an open book, too.
At some point he probably stopped trying to hide his growing feelings for you, though you either didn’t notice his sudden shift or you didn’t care.
Vulnerability has never been a part of Rin, even before Itoshi Sae ruined his life.
He despises how you so easily pry him apart, skinning him alive with your hand lathering down his chest as you laugh. 
Still, he’s grown accustomed to your fingers stringing through his hair, to the way your head tilts when he explains football plays to you, to the obvious way you fluster when he attempts (poorly) at flirting with you.
He’s gotten especially fond of the way you meet him at the end of his practices with such sweet, wandering hands—pushing the hair stuck to his forehead from sweat away from his eyes; using a towel to wipe up his neck; the squeeze you give his palms as you examine them to see if there are any new cuts and bruises.
Usually, he’s the epitome of confidence in his plays. Today, however, his cheeks burn as you approach him with the same honeyed smile.
“My shots were shoddy,” he admits before you can even get a word out. You only raise a brow, hands faltering in front of you. “That was lame.”
“I think you’re good.”
“Good,” he frowns. “But not great?”
“The greatest,” you quickly correct yourself, smiling at his cravings for praise. You’re armed with a fresh towel like you always are, reaching up to clean his face as if it’s the only thing you were born to do.
He relishes in your gentle touch, peering at you through his lashes while you prattle on about how amazing he was even though he missed half of his shots.
You were so blindly supportive, it sickens him. 
Not because he felt you were being disingenuous, but because he’s not deserving of your praise. 
For the first time in a long time, it feels as though his soul is disconnected from his body. He used to walk the earth this way—uninterested in his surroundings and obsessed with only one thing.
Itoshi Sae. Itoshi Sae. Itoshi Sae.
Suddenly, he’s thirteen again and gasping for air; screaming into his pillow and trashing their shared awards until his mother comes rushing in to stop him. He’s alone in a field, abandoned and crushed.
It’s not like he’d never lost before, even in front of you. Loss was just a part of football as much as he hated it.
But your praise only makes his stomach turn, because he knows you mean it.
You truly do believe he’s the best, when really he’s been futile in his attempts to catch up with the big brother he admired so much as a kid.
“Stop,” he gently interrupts.
Rin tries to use his hair to hide the wetness of his eyes, with little success. You can see right through him, unfortunately. It’s a talent he wishes you didn’t have.
“Rin?” You say softly, reaching up to brush the hair out of the way. He doesn’t try and back up or swat your hand away, instead letting you see his miserable expression. You sigh quietly, looking more exasperated than surprised.
“Sorry,” he mutters halfheartedly.
You shake your head. “You have nothing to apologize for.”
Shame boils in his stomach at your reassurance. There is something to apologize for. Here you are, supporting him with all your heart, and all he can think about is his stupid brother. How he’ll never catch up. How he’ll never be good enough.
Doesn’t your kindness warrant his attention at the very least?
“Come on,” you tug at his hand. “Let’s get you a pick-me-up.”
Rin abides silently, body following yours off the field and onto the streets though his mind has floated off elsewhere.
He tries to count how many steps you take in between the field and the destination, but loses count somewhere around three hundred. Then he moves on to counting the hairs on the back of your head. He loses count at one hundred. Eventually, he gives up and opts for staring at your conjoined hands while he lags behind.
When you come to a halt, he nearly bumps into your back.
The ringing in his ears stops as he blinks at his surroundings. Waves crash against the shore of the sandbank, singing the song of the ocean. It had been so long since Rin walked down this stretch of the shore, he almost forgot what the sea looked like.
“Wait here,” you urge as you hold him by the shoulders then disappear around the corner.
He collapses at the wall separating land from sea, swinging his legs under the railings to sit comfortably as he remembers doing when he was a kid. His gym bag is abandoned behind him, cleats and all.
When you return, you shove a popsicle into his hand.
He’s confused at first, just looking absently at the packaging. It must be for a concerning amount of time, because you eventually pipe up.
“Do you need me to open it for you?”
Rin glares at you and your teasing smile. Carefully, he unpackages the treat and pops it in his mouth.
Sweetness melts over his tongue and he exhales sharply through his nose. You watch him in amusement with your own treat stuck in your mouth.
Silence engulfs you, eating Rin from the inside out until he feels ill. He holds his half-eaten popsicle in front of him, watching it melt down his hand.
You stare at him for a second before nudging him lightly with your elbow.
“I was being serious. You were really good. I can’t even imagine playing like you do.”
Rin’s stomach turns. The last thing he wants is your pity.
“You don’t have to be so nice,” he mumbles, resting his chin on the railing. “42 percent.”
“42 percent?” You echo, peering over the railing to get a better look at his face.
“The percent of shots I made today.”
“Come on,” you urge gently. “Aren’t you being too hard on yourself?”
“If I’m not hard on myself, I’ll never—” he stops, choking lightly on his spit. When you don’t interrupt, he shoves the popsicle back in his mouth. “Whatever. You wouldn't get it.”
It’s quiet again, save for the crashing of waves upon rock. Rin thinks for a moment that maybe he had gone too far, or that his little meltdown had freaked you out.
But when he finally dares to look at you again, you’re smiling.
“Maybe not,” you admit with a whisper. “But I do know this…” You reach over and cup his cheek with your free hand, thumb sweeping the expanse of his cheek soothingly. “There is no one—and I mean no one—who works harder than you do.”
He swallows thickly, subconsciously nudging his face a little further into your palm.
“You deserve to be a little kinder to yourself.”
The way his heart catches in his throat is strange. He can’t describe it. The warmth in his belly is foreign, but it’s pleasant.
For the first time in the year he’s gotten to know you, the thought crosses his mind:
I think I’m in love with you.
Rin’s mouth opens with the idea, but he forces it shut just as fast.
Fear grips his lungs and squeezes, stealing his air and forcing him to pull away from your touch.
“Okay,” he breathes in resignation.
You seem stunned by his sudden retreat, smile faltering ever so slightly. But you recover quickly, hugging yourself as you slouch over the railing.
Conversation moves on just like that. He appreciated that about you, too. He never had to dwell.
It feels nice, everything about this; to have his legs dangling over the edge of the cement, feet barely ghosting over the surface of the water; to have a popsicle melting between his teeth while he listens to you talk.
For some reason, it feels as though he’s reclaiming lost time, reliving a moment he thought he would never have again.
When he checks his popsicle stick, it tells him he’s a winner for the first time since he was thirteen.
(He finally allows himself to believe it when your knee gently knocks into his.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2021
“Frog cotton candy?”
“Frog shaped cotton candy,” Rin corrects, peering around the giant fluff of candy to look at you quizzically.
“Yeah,” you giggle. “But why?”
He grumbles quietly, cheeks a soft shade of pink as he shoves the treat into your hands.
“I thought you’d like it. Nevermind,” he deadpans, turning around to toss it into the garbage.
Your laugh crescendos and he feels his heart squeeze with affection. When your hand stops him by the forearm, he thinks he might explode.
“It’s cute.”
You pick apart the floss ruthlessly with your fingers, and he watches almost in a trance—hypnotized by just your existence.
(When you finally pop the sugar into your mouth, he imagines it melting on his own tongue. The thought makes him unbearably warm and he forces it away.)
His fascination with you doesn't end there.
There's a certain charm to you that he can't understand—something that draws him in, tantalizing but terrifying at the same time.
He can't help the way he watches in a daze, the way you've ensnared all his attention and taken up the space in his mind. 
Rin has never been good at being kind, but here he is.
Here he is, bringing you cotton candy because he thought it was stupid but cute.
Here he is, rolling up the sleeves of your yukata with a gentle scolding when you rush over to catch goldfish.
And here he is, letting you cling to his arm as if he's the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth.
He really, really hates it—how mushy you make his brain feel.
He's halfway through re-rolling your sleeves with a half-hearted scowl on his face when you stop him, hand pressed to his forearm.
“Listen, Rin.”
“Hm?” He leans down so that he can peer at your face hidden behind your almost nonexistent candy floss.
“I have to show you something.”
Rin stops dead in his tracks, raising a brow as he fully turns toward you. “What is it?”
“Can you close your eyes for me?”
His heart does a somersault in his chest. “You’re not doing anything weird, are you?”
“Who do you think I am?” You sputter.
He lets out a long sigh before complying, squeezing his eyes shut. After a long silence, he considers peeking a little bit.
That is, until he feels your breath gently fanning over his parted lips.
Nearly leaping back, he wills himself to stay grounded and slowly slides his hands up your arms until he gets to your shoulders. As he imagined, your body is impossibly close to his.
It takes every bit of concentration he has not to waver. If he really tries, he can focus on how your breath smells sweet of candy. How your hair blows softly with the summer breeze, tickling his cheeks. How you smell. How you breathe.
(Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. His heart is about to beat out of his chest. Is that okay?)
You tense up in his hold and suddenly you’re retreating from him, swiftly pulling out of his arms. Just as he’s about to ask you what happened, there’s a piece of candy shoved into his mouth.
“You wanted to try it, didn’t you?” You ask rather breathlessly. He opens his eyes, looking at you curiously.
Rin has never seen this expression on you before, lips pulled tight in embarrassment and pupils blown. You look more like a wild animal caught in a cage than someone who just made a move on him.
He gingerly takes the empty paper cone from your hands and folds it up, no longer able to meet your gaze lest he explode on the spot.
“Yeah,” he says softly, shuffling over to dump it into a bin. “Thanks.”
When he turns around to look at you again, his breath gets caught in his throat.
Why are you laughing?
You giggle into your palm, hiding your gleeful smile from him as you double over slightly.
“Your face is all red!” You holler.
He grunts in embarrassment, using the back of his hand to hide his own face. “Shut the hell up,” he spits.
“It’s almost like you wanted me to kiss you!”
“Oh my god, please drop it.”
“No way! I’ve never seen you look like that before!”
(‘Speak for yourself,’ he thinks.)
“So what if I did?”
Your laughter halts as if it was swallowed into the pits of your stomach. Slowly unraveling to stand up straight, he sees another expression he’s never been able to imagine on you, but he can’t quite place it.
“Did what?” You murmur.
“Want you to kiss me.”
Your face is warm under the glow of lanterns, eyes shimmering with the overhead lights. Rin watches your mouth open and close repeatedly as you try and formulate some sort of response.
A firework explodes atop of you, and he wonders if it just saved you.
You seem jarred for only a moment more until you jolt, grabbing him roughly by the arm and giving him a pull.
“I just remembered,” you gasp. “I actually did have something to show you!”
Rin doesn’t get a word in before you’re dragging him along by the arm. With each boom of an explosion, your footsteps pick up, building into a full blown sprint out of the festival grounds and through the thicket.
You tug him along, guiding him by the hand through the winding path of trees and logs. His stamina is better than yours but you’re pushing up the hill despite your huffing and puffing—it makes him laugh with you.
When you break free of the forest, Rin’s eyes focus on a field of plush grass and buttercups.
You let go of his hand, flinging yourself forward and spinning on your heel to exaggerate how wide the opening is with your arms.
“Isn’t it great?” You shout over the fireworks. “Away from the crowd!”
He rushes up to you so that you can stop yelling, invading your personal space until you can hear him just at his normal volume.
“It’s perfect,” he tells you earnestly.
You grin up at him widely before pulling him along to the edge of the clearing. You plop down together, eyes glued to the sky as the fireworks rage on.
Rin only lasts a few seconds before his eyes drift to the side, trying to drink in your expression. It’s become a habit of his to try and imprint your very existence into his brain.
Against his better judgment, his hand creeps toward yours until your fingers are overlapped.
Thankfully, you don’t use the opportunity to tease him about it, instead shifting a little closer until you’re practically burrowed into his side. If it were anyone else, he would have shoved them away.
(When did he stop trying to push you away?)
When your pinkies slowly close together, he feels as if he can’t breathe properly.
Mark-to-mark, it’s as though he is full of all the love he’s ever felt for you from every life—past or future. Like there’s a love that exists within him that transcends lifetimes, if it were even possible.
If he were to peer into another dimension, would you still be together like this? Would you be plucking buttercups and mindlessly twirling them between your fingers? Would he be itching to envelop you in his arms just to devour you?
His thoughts cease when you take a deep breath.
“I used to come here alone,” you admit.
“No one took you?” He asks. Your gaze is piercing the night sky, never leaving the show. He can see the bloom of colours in them.
“Not since I was little, but I always loved it here.”
The question burns hot in Rin’s mind: even if it was a little lonely sometimes?
He remembers back to the night that he first saw you, with your hands dipping into the murky waters of a frog pond and an air of desolation surrounding you. Then he remembers how he couldn’t sleep that night. Not with the image of you crouching there alone burned into his memory.
“Did you know this festival is a celebration of love?” He suddenly asks.
Oh what the fuck? Oh, god. Why did he say that?
That was so lukewarm of him. So stupid. So pointless and lame.
He just wanted something to say to you, something that would make him stop thinking about how you might have been alone for all that time before you knew him.
The silence burns between you, tense and awkward until he starts stuttering out something else to fill the void. But then you look at him, slow and intrigued and so damn amused that he can feel heat rising to the tips of his ears.
“I had no idea.”
There’s a longing in your expression that tells a different story. A twitch of your pinky against his that gives away your blatant lie.
And, damnit. Here he is again, four years later under the same stars. Under the same fireworks. Only this time, he’s able to see your face even closer as it lights up a million different colours—teal like his eyes; rose like his cheeks; golden like the heart he’s tried so hard to protect.
Four years later and he still thinks you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen: pinkies interlocked, sheepish smile on your face, an undeniable shake in your voice that means you have more that you’re too nervous to say.
For a moment he considers finally letting go of all the things keeping him bolted and chained where he stands, swallowing the key to the cage surrounding his fragile, thumping heart. And for that fleeting second, he feels as though he’s the bravest man alive—that nothing could stop him even if you were to turn away and snub him out with the heel of your foot.
But how could he open his mouth and tell you anything when all he feels is the sick twisting of his stomach, the daunting glare of the older brother he adored so much, and the coldness of snow soaking his clothes as he sits in a field and cries?
There’s a burning, raging fire within him. Something primal and afraid and unchanging despite how much he wants to fall into your arms the way your shared etchings say he should.
It screams at him: run away. Run. Run. Run. This will only end in hurt.
He’s too fucked up. Too messed in the head and too quick to anger because he’s actually soft at heart, easy to betray—
“Rin.”
Your hand swiftly captures his face and he’s dragged unceremoniously out of his reverie.
Of course you would be able to pick out his turmoil by expression alone. By the droop of his lips into a frown—not the annoyed one he would flash his teammates, or the grimace he would scare children away with. The kind that’s sad and slow and timid, like an animal caught in a net.
“I’m really happy that we’re friends.”
“Friends?” He breathes, half confused and half incredulous.
Deep down he knows that it’s an attempt to comfort him without being too sappy. Maybe you can sense it somewhere in your soul that he would probably break down and sob if you were to make him feel any more vulnerable than he already is with you. It’s an effort to take away whatever guilt he feels and give him a chance to relax.
However, he can see a different tale in your eyes.
Loneliness as empty as the sky on a cloudy night. A yearning for more, for someone, for him, to fill the gap. I’m tired of waiting. That’s all he can read beneath the sea of colour exploding in your irises.
It only makes him feel worse, but he allows himself to be lied to anyway if only to feel the warmth of your skin against his just a bit longer.
“Yeah.”
Your pinky twitches again. He can feel the brush of your name against his, the grate of your matching soul marks. Your eyes tear away from his and are glued to the infinite sky above once more. To the stars you know are there but are covered by smoke and fire.
Rin only stares at you. He can’t focus on the explosions of fireworks anymore, not when you’re right in front of him looking so perfect. His summer treasure.
“Yeah?”
He knows he sounds dumb, repeating everything like an oaf who can’t fathom what’s being said. You giggle and it floors him.
“Just being able to stand here with you—” you glance at him again, only for a second. He can see the exhaustion in that moment, but he’s too selfish to pry. “—I think I’m the luckiest person alive.”
“Even if…” He swallows harshly. It feels like shrapnel cutting down his throat. “Even if I can’t be more?”
“Even so.”
There’s a pause and you open your mouth to say more, maybe to give him an ultimatum or to elaborate on your feelings, but then you’re interrupted by the end of the display.
Counteless fireworks explode above you in the finale. Rin can hear the awestruck gasps of families down the hill, the distant cries of children and the faint shutter of cameras filling the air.
He realizes then: he’s been smiling. His cheeks hurt from how big it’s gotten. And you’re smiling at him, too.
(The fireworks rage on, but in the end, all he can look at is you.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2022
Falling in love with Itoshi Rin was one of the most foolish, most wonderful things that could have happened to you.
He was an enigma in and of itself, a mystery of a soulmate who was able to love you wholeheartedly and push you away at the same time.
There were nights where you would stay up wondering why he was your soulmate when it seemed like all he wanted to be was alone. Other times, you fell asleep smiling to yourself knowing that somewhere deep down you both belonged to each other. 
The universe chose you. The universe chose him. It was indisputable, yet you still had doubts.
Tonight is one of those “foolish” nights. It seems as though you have been stood up.
For three hours you’ve waited in the same spot at the gates of the festival, watching families and couples pass by but never the one person you’d wait until the end of the world for. The sun has long since gone to sleep over the horizon and the streets are fully lit up with lanterns for the festivities.
6 pm. That was the time Rin promised he would meet you. In the past, he was always late but at least had the decency to tell you beforehand that you could go ahead without him. Only when you arrived and sat down to wait for him had he finally messaged you.
Rin: gonna be late. see you at 7.
7 pm. That was the rescheduled time. It was when you expected to see him walking up to you in his yukata that you begged him to wear this year, matching adoringly with yours. And at 7 pm you would tell him. You would tell him everything.
For months prior you had practiced almost pathetically so, recited and perfected your speech while staring at your reflection in a mirror. You’d written him a letter, too.
7 pm. You were finally going to thank Rin for everything. For accompanying you to such a silly festival even though you know he loathes it. For meeting you under the stars and the moon and the fireworks time and time again. For bringing life back into a childhood memory that you had long since hated.
7 pm. You were going to tell him thank you. You were going to tell him you loved him, just as it had been written in the stars many years before you were born.
It’s 9 pm, nearing 10 and the start of the fireworks show. He missed the entire night without explanation.
At 9:58 pm, just as you’re about to give up all hope, you finally come face to face with teal eyes and a stupidly handsome face sheen with sweat. It shouldn’t hurt so much, the way he looks at you so dismissively as if he hadn’t blown you off all night. 
“Sorry,” he mutters disingenuously, attempting to brush past you without a second thought. “Let’s go, I’m thirsty.”
He has his gym bag slung over his shoulder and a windbreaker over his uniform. No sign of the yukata you had picked out for him to wear.
You don’t follow him, staring at his back in disbelief. When he realizes you aren’t trailing behind, he turns on his heel and raises a brow in question. “Are you coming?”
“I was waiting for you all night,” you tell him coldly. I was waiting for you all this time and you never showed up. 
He swallows thickly, suddenly overcome by guilt because of your downcast expression. “I know. I lost track of time.”
“Lost track of time?” You scoff incredulously. Your mouth opens as if you have more to say, but you’re interrupted by a bang.
Rin’s eyes flutter closed. He can’t listen to this. He can’t watch.
He knows this all too well. He knew it all along.
The universe was wrong. Itoshi Rin was never cut out to be someone’s soulmate.
“We’re missing it…”
Your back is turned to him but all he can imagine is the terrible expression you must be making right now, twisted in sadness and anger. The worse image is a completely blank face—unfeeling and cold. He doesn’t even want to think about it.
Booms echo in the distance yet all he can focus on is the faint hum in his ears, the horrible churning in his stomach and the fog of guilt clouding his head.
“I’m sorry,” he says so quietly that he’s sure you can’t even hear him under the deep, bellowing explosions over the horizon.
He doesn’t remember the last time he apologized for anything like this. Being cold and aloof was just in his nature. Never before had he felt like it was necessary to be remorseful for the way he is—for how he was made to be.
The slight tremble of your shoulders and the way you use the back of your sleeves to wipe tears from your eyes force the words out of him before he can stop it. He tells you again,
“I’m sorry.”
He weakly attempts to grab you by the arms, holding you from behind so he can make you look at him. You jerk away fast as lightning, knocking him away as you swivel around to glare.
“Why didn’t you come?” You demand. There’s anger shaking in your voice. Rin doesn’t know how to respond to it, not when you’ve always been so understanding and kind. Perhaps he was too cruel for you if he was going to break you this way.
“I got caught up with—”
“With football, right?” You laugh bitterly, taking a generous step back. Hurt pours from every inch of your expression and all it does is make his heart ache.
“Stop,” he suddenly snaps. You flinch at his tone and shrink back, only adding to his guilt. He always had the worst temper. “Don’t be like this. You know it was important,” he explains, gentler this time. Softer, trying to coax you back over.
There’s a beat of complete silence, save for the hollowed explosions in the distance. Rin blinks at you a couple times before his frayed nerves finally calm again. And then he realizes something terrible.
The look in your eyes, the deflation of your shoulders—this is what utter defeat looks like. For a moment deja vu rushes through his blood, bringing him back to a time when he too felt as miserable as you. 
Every year he’s had the opportunity to read your expression: I’m tired of waiting. But he always foolishly assumed you would still wait around for him forever. That your patience would be as infinite as the stars in the sky. That just because he had the privilege of having his name scrawled down your pinky, he would be guaranteed to have you.
It was disgustingly selfish.
Just as he opens his mouth to apologize again, you storm up to him and shove the piece of paper roughly into his chest. With the closed gap, he can clearly see the tears streaming down your face illuminated by warm lanterns.
“Just forget it.”
“Wait—” He catches your wrist as you push past him, stopping you in your tracks again despite your struggle to get away. “Come on, I said I’m sorry!”
“Rin,” you sniffle, voice breaking with just the syllable of his name. It makes him falter. “I’m tired.”
“But—”
“You can’t even spare me one night? Just this one night in the entire year?” You breathe, no longer trying to dance around the subject. “What is it with you? What are you so afraid of?”
Being put in the spotlight never bothered Rin before. It was easy enough to ignore when all his life he was watched carefully. But it’s different with you; you’re the only one looking at him in this moment yet it feels like the weight of a million pairs of eyes at once.
An answer comes quickly to his mind, almost natural. He knows exactly what’s wrong with him.
He’s afraid of being left behind again. Of being hurt. Rin is terrified of love and being loved because he’s too pathetically fragile.
The pieces of his heart are clumsily glued together and he’s scared that even the smallest turbulence would send it shattering into a billion shards again. He doesn’t know how to put himself back together properly anymore. 
Itoshi Sae permanently fucked him up.
Though they were on slightly better terms now, the scars would always haunt him. The simple solution is to shut everyone else out, to protect the weak heart he harbours.
If he told you that, would you understand? Or would you try and claw his name off your skin?
You take his silence as an answer and pry away from him again, holding yourself protectively—guarding yourself from the catastrophe that follows Rin wherever he goes.
“Goodbye, Rin.”
He doesn’t watch you go. 
The nearest bench becomes his temporary home. He could do hundreds of plays in a football game and never tire, but for some reason your disdain has sucked every ounce of energy from his body.
It doesn’t register that he’s still holding the paper you forced into his hands until it crinkles in his hold. He slowly unfolds it revealing ink sloppily smeared across the page.
And then he reads it. Again. And again. And again, until it’s shaking in his hold. Until the dull ache in his heart feels like the pierce of a knife. 
Rin doesn’t know what to do anymore. He’s always had one clear goal for his entire life, but now everything is all muddled. Messy, like everything else he touches.
He turns everything into a disaster.
Does he chase after you and risk having his fragile heart broken all over again? Does he risk being left behind or does he close off the gate for that option entirely? He could sit in his cowardice and never change, preserving his heart forever in this moment of time; a polaroid in the slideshow of his mortality.
There’s a familiarity to this all. Perhaps he had lived through this decision a million lives before this. Maybe he would live through it again an infinite amount of times, so long as it was your name etched into his skin.
Was he as messed up in this life as he was in every other?
If he had ruined everything in this life, if he made the wrong choice and drove you away in hatred until you drew your last breath, then maybe he could make it all up to you in the next one.
Or, if that were the case, maybe he was born into this world only to love you—to make up for the millenia where he ran away.
Rin’s legs have never moved so fast. Not in football. Not even from his brother. If you were the light at the end of the tunnel then he would keep chasing you forever, he thinks. Until his wounded heart gave out.
Of all the stupid decisions he’s made in his life, have any of them amounted to anything? He’s going to give it one last try. One more chance to prove to himself that not everything he touches burns to ashes.
“Wait!”
You visibly startle, eyes wide as you turn to see Rin dashing toward you. He doesn’t give you even a moment to ask questions, to wonder why he’s coming back to break your heart again. 
You’re engulfed in a hug faster than you can blink, stumbling back from the force of his body colliding with yours until your sandals get kicked off your feet.
“Rin?” You murmur his name in disbelief, breathless even though you weren’t the one sprinting down the road.
“Just give me one more chance,” he stammers out. You can feel the rapid rise and fall of his shoulders as he holds you and fights for air simultaneously. Your hands twitch at your sides but you remain lifeless in his arms.
He tries again: “Let me prove it to you. Let me prove that it wasn’t some freak accident that led me to you. That my name on your skin is meant to be there.”
“Don’t do this,” you tell him quietly, lips brushing against his ear as you speak. “I don’t want to be loved and feared at the same time.”
“But…” Rin squeezes your body against his, almost desperately. Clinging to what he has ruined. “For once in my life, I want something more.”
I don’t want to be alone anymore.
You hesitantly shift, hands slowly trailing up his back until your body is curling against his. He can trace the outline of your body against his, like a puzzle piece that he was missing slotted perfectly in his grasp.
“I thought my soulmate would only slow me down and break me. I was wrong. I know that now.”
He slowly rocks your bodies back and forth. You pull away until your eyes meet his, red with tears. It’s the messiest he has ever seen you, but his heart refuses to be still. It aches.
Beautiful. It’s the only word he can describe you with. It didn’t matter if you were lit up under the wondrous sky, or handing him coffee in a crowded café, or sobbing in his arms. 
You would only ever be his infinitely beautiful soulmate.
It’s the only constant he would have in this life and every other, even if you were to break his heart. It would be the single greatest achievement in his time, above football, above any of his petty competitions—that your name is etched down his pinky.
It scares him. It thrills him.
With the distant roar of fireworks, he kisses you. And you allow him, hiccuping against his lips as you cry.
You stay like that for a long time, listening to the hollow shockwaves of fireworks exploding miles away. He’s the first to draw back, raking in shallow breaths. You chase him, finding solace against his lips once more but not fully indulging him with another kiss.
“Do you fear me?” You whisper into his mouth.
“More than anything,” he tells you.
“Do you love me?”
After a moment of contemplation, he answers,
“More than anything.”
You nod slowly, awkwardly pulling away from him and taking a step back. It’s your first kiss and you don’t know where you’re supposed to look anymore. Rin stops your nervous shifting with his hand swooping under your chin.
“One year. I promise.” You look at him in confusion, so he continues. “Next year, when the season and my contract are over, I’ll meet you there. At the pond.”
You seem skeptical still, with your brows knitted together and a lost haze in your eyes. He raises his pinky, the one with your name forever grafted into the skin, and offers it to you.
“I pinky promise.”
It’s so ridiculous, wearing his heart on his sleeve with something he learned about on playgrounds when he was a child. A pinky promise shouldn’t mean any more than the words he has already spoken. But for some reason, your eyes light up.
He feels nothing but relief when your pinkies lock together.
“Okay,” you breathe.
“You’ll wait for me?”
“Rin.” His name leaves you in a breathless laugh that makes his world spin. It sounds so tired yet so sweet. “I’ve been waiting all my life.”
“I’m sorry,” he says once more for good measure. You nod. A wordless acceptance.
Itoshi Rin is your soulmate. It’s not like that fact will ever change no matter the time, no matter the distance.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2023
Fate is a funny thing. Soulmates are a funny thing.
The universe threw Rin curveball after curveball, beating him down until he was nothing but a husk heavenly built for one purpose only: beat Sae. Beat Itoshi Sae.
There were times when he would lay awake at night wondering why he was given this life, why he was thrust into hardship and hurt and betrayal. How could something so perfect, something so all-knowing, be so cruel?
For as long as the name had been grafted into his skin, he resented the idea of a soulmate.
He hated the idea that only one person in the world would be his eternal weakness. That one day, one person would hold every piece of his soul in their hands. Even then, his soulmate was the other half of him—his salvation. His downfall.
They would know every inch of his skin. Every bleeding wound of his heart. Every bruise and scar along his legs from cleats and nails and gravel. Having a soulmate meant having every part of him exposed, to be judged and worshiped at the same time.
At your hands, though, he’s certain this is what he was born for—to spend the rest of his days by your side even if you were doing something as mundane as catching frogs together.
“You’re scaring them,” you hiss quietly.
Your fingers sink into the pond and Rin watches your reflections ripple as water fills your palms. Your faces contort and meld into one being. In some ways, it’s a familiar feeling—to have been intertwined with you since his very conception.
“You’re terrible at this.”
“It’s your fault!”
“Right,” he deadpans. “You haven’t caught a single one all night.”
“You were late,” you remind him with a huff, cheeks inflated. “Before you got here I was catching frogs all night. Coincidence?”
Rin makes another noise, something akin to a snort. But he doesn’t acknowledge your statement, instead reaching over to gingerly roll the sleeves of your yukata up to your elbows.
“Are you always so sloppy? Your sleeves are getting all wet.”
You glare at him from the side, delivering a deadly warning. “Are you always such a pain in the ass?”
“I get it, I get it. I said I was sorry for being late. Nii-chan really wanted to try that new ice cream place downtown.”
Your gaze drifts to him in the shimmering reflection, watching his smile soften at the mention of his big brother. It was wonderful that they were trying to patch things up.
Sae had decided to come home after all, promising Rin that they would play together again once they both took a well deserved break.
You could tell that Rin was trying his best not to make a big deal out of it, but the way he cried into your shoulder later that night said it all.
“I feel bad having you come all the way out here just to see me. Your brother is back in Japan isn’t he?”
“Yeah. And he wants to meet you.”
You nearly fall over. “What?”
“Please don’t look so starstruck about that. I feel sick.”
Laughing, you recentre yourself, sitting back on your heels with your hands on your knees. “Sorry, sorry! It’s not that…”
Rin raises a brow. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“It’s just—” you fumble, cheeks burning hot at the idea of being introduced to Rin’s family after all these years. Formally, as his partner. His soulmate. The name they had all known since he was thirteen. “What would I even say to him?”
He looks at you in bewilderment. Then, he snickers, only laughing harder when you smack his arm.
“Don’t worry about that,” he assures, reaching out to pat the top of your head. “Just be yourself. My family will love you.”
“Thank you,” you whisper, studying your reflections in the water with a soft smile. You’re staring right back at yourself, but Rin is only looking at you.
“I haven’t done anything special.”
“You lit up my world,” you laugh, turning back up to look at him properly. You make a mini explosion with your hands. “Boom! Like that. A firework.”
“You’re too corny,” he murmurs in embarrassment, turning his head away to hide his flushed face. “Can’t you explain it like a normal person?”
“No can do,” you tell him, voice gentler this time. After a pause, you shuffle your sandals around in the mud and take a deep breath. “If you want me to be totally serious…”
You lunge over and tackle him into your arms. He nearly loses his balance holding the both of you upright, stumbling back on his heels before he catches your waist. You don’t seem to share the sentiment of staying pristine, knees digging into the dirt as you squeeze him tighter.
Rin feels his heart catch in his throat the same way you’ve made it for the last six years.
“Thank you. For letting me love you. For being my soulmate.”
His hand is automatically in your hair, scratching your scalp as he smiles into your shoulder.
“I’m sure I gave you nothing but a hard time,” he grumbles.
“But I still love you.”
“Even though you had to wait?”
“Even so.”
“And that I’m a pain in the ass?”
“Even then, I do.”
Rin burrows himself into your neck, hiding his face again. It does a poor job at masking the kind of expression he’s making, though, considering how warm his skin is.
“What if I’m not good enough?”
He feels terrible—guilty that he needs to keep having this conversation with you. But you always comfort him the same way. He hopes you always will.
Drawing his head up with your muddy hands, you dirty his cheeks just to get a glimpse of him. You murmur a half-hearted sorry for making a mess.
Then you’re kissing him.
“I’ll be here to remind you how much I cherish you.”
You nip his bottom lip and he opens wider. You whisper into his mouth,
“And how happy I am that Itoshi Rin was born into this world.”
Itoshi Rin, broken. He who thought that he could never be put back together.
Itoshi Rin, vengeful. He who believed the only happiness that existed for him in this world was to surpass his brother.
Itoshi Rin, who did not believe in his soulmate while staring right at them. And Itoshi Rin, who finally allowed himself to love you wholly, completely, as it was written in the stars.
“I love you,” he says, as if just those three words could encapsulate everything he feels for you.
“Always?” You giggle. He rolls his eyes. 
“Wherever you are, and wherever you may be, I will.”
You kiss him one more time for good measure.
“That was corny.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2024
“No peeking.”
Rin folds up his piece of paper and hangs it from the bamboo tree. You’re tugging him along before he can even properly check to see if it’s been secured.
“Come on, I don’t want to miss the fireworks!”
He wouldn’t miss them for the world. You’ve always looked the most beautiful under the brightened summer sky.
The wish he scribbled down blows softly in the breeze as both of you rush by, back to the festival where it all began.
7 July 2024. I wish I had the words to tell you how much I love you.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
extra notes. hi! if you made it this far, i'd like to give you the warmest most grateful thank you ever ( ´ ω `)
so, here it is. i've been working on this since last september-ish... for some people that amount of time is not much, but genuinely, i've never devoted so much attention and time to one single fic and i hope i did this one justice. rin has always been a guilty pleasure of mine to write for. i hope this man stays far far away from me until i can stomach even looking at his name again LOL ‾́ ◡ ‾́
also i finally admitted defeat and took out all my pictures and dividers because tumblr was fighting my posts that had any. so... sorry the formatting looks like this
additional tags: @jenoutof10 @hanrinz @itoshiexx lol hi guys it made it out of the drafts i hope you like it
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ch3rish-ning · 3 months ago
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SAY YOU LOVE ME, 엔하이픈 성훈
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— my heart beats , for you only.
(ƒemale ℛeader ‪‪❤︎‬. Sunghoon x reader / fluff, oneshot , kissing ‘) ── .✦ reblogs + wc. 564
A/N: I lowkey enjoyed writing this [>=<]
feedback appreciated ☆
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365 days around the clock. Never skipping a beat, a love so refreshing it can never be replicated, so delicate that even the slightest interference can shatter it. You cherish the beauty of it, the thought that a man like him could ever love you so. He's seen all of you. The good, the broken, the damaged that's far beyond repair, yet he saw a girl that was worth loving and a girl that needed someone to sweep her off her feet and make her feel like the most important thing in the world.
Simply because you are, at least in his world. Lying on the bed with limbs tangled together, you caress his hair, loving the silent intimate moments like these. Nothing but soft breathing to fill the silence. Neither of you can barely remember the last time you left the comfort of your home, too wrapped up in one another. "This is nice…" you softly croak out while twirling his hair between your fingers. Looking up at you with his sleepy eyes, he answers, "Yeah?"
"Yeah," you sigh in content, "we do this often, but it feels like it's the first time all over again." Soft laughter bubbles from within him. "You're such a sap, you know?" Playfully hitting his head, you roll back over on your side. "Hey! I'm not a sap...I just like being with you," you smile cheekily.
You always know how to make him flustered with the littlest things you say; that's what made him go crazy about you. You watch as his ears change color from natural to a soft crimson pink, something you've grown fond of in your relationship, making sure to say things more often just to see the change in color. He groans, burying his face in your neck. "Must you always tease me, huh?"
"I can't help it, you know it's what I do best." Grinning from ear to ear, you ruffle his hair up a bit, loving how he always keeps it fluffy. "Remind me why I love you again," he asks teasingly, mumbling under his breath. "Because you know me best, and no one has your heart like I do."
He holds those words close, letting them replay in the back of his mind, feeling a sense of tranquility pass over him; he cups your cheeks softly, pulling you into the sweetest kiss that could make you cry. Lips melting together, you savor the familiar feeling, the familiar sweetness of honey laced in this kiss. Deepening the kiss as he holds you closer, soft sighs escape from your lips.
This is a long-awaited love that you've desired and a feeling that's been imprinted on your skin and engraved in your mind. You simply cannot get enough of it and only desire more as he further opens his heart to you just as you open up yours to him. Pulling away slowly, he searches your eyes with his own low, sleepy ones. Words coming out ever so faintly but still audibly: "I love you."
Heart still skipping a beat as if it's your first time hearing those words again. You allow the words to dance across your mind, never forgetting them: "I love you more." You respond, smiling softly at him. This love is delicate and meant to be cherished always. And you wouldn't have it any other way because your heart beats for him only.
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©CH3RISH-NING 2025
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